A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hiya, I am just wondering if I am normal, or this situation is normal. Well, I have been in a relationship with my fiance for nearly three years and I have always looked at porn on the internet. He does not know this, nor will I tell him because I am actually embarrassed by it. But the thing is, looking at porn really turns me on and I'm not addicted to it or anything but i like it? Me and my fiance have the most amazing sex life and its not like I am watching this because of things that we dont do in the bedroom or fantasies because we literally do have a really good sex life and we are very open about what we want when it comes to sex. I am just wondering if this is normal? I know that most women hate their boyfriends looking at porn and feel betrayed? I konw that most men love porn - and the only women that like it must only be those starring in it?
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fiance, porn, sex life, the internet Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 November 2008): If you're not addicted, I don't see it as a problem. But if it escalates, and you want to watch increasingly hard stuff, I'd take a look at that. Also, I would question the secrecy--not a good idea in relationships. Not that you have to over-share everything, but it's not good to actively hide something.
Just be careful of your frequency. I think that's key and what ends up upsetting people.
A
female
reader, leanne _a +, writes (5 October 2008):
 i love it tooo your not alone ! my husband does not know but i think its good for the brain and the sex life your looking at it for diffrent reasons most men r just being dirty and watch the woman so dont worry ur not alone !!!
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 October 2008): It is normal. From early in our dating and into our marriage of 20 years, my wife and I have enjoyed looking at porn together and separately. We especially love the girl on girl scenes and she thinks the she males are hilarious. She also comments about men's dicks which I like looking at too.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 September 2008): lol.. what a great question.. and the answer is, looking at porn is normal.. women can feel aroused by porn too. It's not really fair to hide this from your boyfriend though... Most men (not all) like to look at porn and if they find a woman who likes it too, well then they get double the excitement and the pleasure. My ex, a long time relationship of 18years, was very pleasantly surprised to find I liked pornography, erotica and romance even more than him. My own private session of self-pleasuring was interrupted by him.. and I will say no more, except to say it was the best sex I've ever experienced. Don't feel ashamed, don't hide, a woman who is comfortable about her sexuality, who likes to look at sex is a great turn on for most (not all) men. Share it with him, let him enjoy your excitement, and I bet you will have the best sex of your life... :^)
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A
female
reader, sugar_sugar  +, writes (15 September 2008):
 Im a female and i enjoy it too, I think its pretty normal though just spoken about less.
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A
male
reader, FETSEA  +, writes (15 September 2008):
PORN is NORM. Equal number of men and women watch in private as well as together. See on screen, what you both do in bed. Only difference, men loudly repeat, what they have seen. Women keep it all on hold. Who is he? Does he enjoy sex jokes; remarks and so on.....or is he a puritan. You may not want to offend. Otherwise just remark that "site xyz" is popular, and sit together. He could surprise you with a list from A to W. So, porns are no harm.Just do not let it drain your time and make you addicted.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 September 2008): Dear Poster
As most of the previous postings have already told you, it is very normal and yeah, I suggest you do arrange to watch it with him; you will be surprise,it might create a lot of extra sparks in your sex life.
Enjoy, have FUN and keep SMILING
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A
male
reader, Replacement  +, writes (14 September 2008):
 Just as many women as men like porn. It's normal, don't worry about it. As long as your sex life/bond with your boyfriend isn't compromised then there's no reason to worry about it. You should tell him, maybe you guys can recommend sites to one another or watch it together. You could open up a whole new world for your sex life too.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 September 2008): You are perfectly normal. Both my wife and ex wife liked porn and both would watch it with me. I'll bet that your fiance also watches it and is afraid to tell you, just like you are afraid to tell him. You could probably have fun watching it together. Not all women hate porn and not all men like it.
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A
male
reader, Jamer70 +, writes (14 September 2008):
 i bet he will like it. Porn can be added into your sex life and enjoyed by you both
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A
female
reader, Aunty Em +, writes (14 September 2008):
 Noooo, not at all. It is just as 'normal' and accepted for women to watch porn as it is for men. Let your boyfriend know - really. I bet he finds it sexy.
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