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age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: i have been with my boyfriend for a year and i am 16 in the uk he is recently turned 24.i love him etc.I think that this bit is great i asked him if he was ready or if he wanted to have sex /do the deed what ever ..and he said that he didnt want to do it yet he wanted to wait .. okay .. everyone knows about us we are no secret .we are just a normal couple in society so.do you think it is rare for a man to refuse sex?do you think he loves me? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Moonknight  +, writes (22 November 2010):
 Sorry CindyCares, but you are incorrect, there is no law stating "The age of consent is 16 in Uk .However it is illegal for a person over 18 to engage in sexual activity with an individual under the age of 18 unless between them there is an age difference of less than 2 years. (Sexual Offence Act 2003, Section 9 )"This is taken from section 9 "sexual activity with a child(1)A person aged 18 or over (A) commits an offence if—(a)he intentionally touches another person (B),(b)the touching is sexual, and(c)either—(i)B is under 16 and A does not reasonably believe that B is 16 or over."As you can see it becomes illegal if the person is aged over 18 and the victim is aged under 16.Source: http://www.legislation.gov.uk/ukpga/2003/42Now to help further answer the question of anonymous poster, it is normal for men to wait, upto some extent, most men find the need to move on sooner or later if the purpose isn't to use the female.However... it is also normal for your man wanting to tear off your clothing and take you like a wild animal. If your man isn't wanting that, there is a possibility his sexual attention is else where
A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (21 November 2010):
 This will probbaly sound a lame answer, but :
why don't you just ask him ?
Same as you asked him if he wanted to make love, now you can ask him why does he want to wait.
Yes, it is rare that men turn down sex ( but surely, not unheard of !) Then again, it is also rare seeing 24 y.o. guys going steady with a 16 y.o. It is an unusual situation, and he may have unusual reasons.
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 November 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionno correction in the uk the age of consent is 16 and at 16 you can have sex with who ever okay so weather you think it is legal or illegal can you help me and give me advice
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A
female
reader, CindyCares +, writes (21 November 2010):
The age of consent is 16 in Uk .However it is illegal for a person over 18 to engage in sexual activity with an individual under the age of 18 unless between them there is an age difference of less than 2 years. (Sexual Offence Act 2003, Section 9 )
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female
reader, celtic_tiger +, writes (21 November 2010):
 So you are 16 (woo!) and yes, that does make you "legal".
BUT that does not mean that you HAVE to be having sex, or even SHOULD be having sex.
As soon as you hit your 16th birthday you do not go out and sleep with anyone just because you can. It doesnt work like that.
It is just an age where society feels that the child (because you are a child until you are 18, like it or not) is capable of understanding and processing the feelings, emotions and actions of a sexual relationship. Sex is a big thing, and children can be easily mislead and used by older, more experienced manipulative men. The age of consent is to protect you.
This man is 24. Thats 8 years younger than you. So when he was 16, you were 8. He has been thru the teenage years, been thru the teenage angst, the hormones, the sexual awakening. He knows how it feels, and maybe he regrets things he did when he was your age. He may feel that you are still too young to be having a sexual relationship. He may feel that he is taking advantage of an inexperienced girl.
He may feel that your relationship has not yet got to the point where sex should be considered. Yes, it might have happened sooner with a woman his own age, but the relationship with a woman the same age as him, would be very different to the one he is having with you now.
Remember, as he is 24, people will be quick to criticise him - very few 24 year old men would want to date, sleep with or hang out with a 16 year old. Most would see this as being a little odd, and that he may have dishonerable intentions towards you - ie, sleep with you, take your virginity and dump you. Most 24 year old men would not look at a girl like you twice, they want women their own age. And please dont jump on me for that statement, it is an observation of society.
He may not want to be your first, that is a BIG pressure on a guy, because he knows that you will probably get emotionally attached to him once the deed is done. He may not want that, so he is keeping you at arms length.
Ultimately you have to be patient. Just because you want sex, doesnt mean he does. Would you be impressed if he was trying to force you to have sex with him?
Just wait it out. When the time is right it will happen. But patience.
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A
male
reader, Cerberus_Raphael  +, writes (21 November 2010):
 I do recall the laws stating that in the UK, whilst the age of consent is 16, it is still illegal to have sex with someone over the age of 18 with the exception of a 1 or 2 year age difference. I would review your country's laws just to be sure. Nevertheless though, you two could be 35 years old and he could still want to wait, only so that he knows that he is with you out of deeper emotions than just lust.
I hope that helps.
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 November 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questioni am legal i am 16 it is not like the usa
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 November 2010): There's nothing wrong with a guy saying he wants to wait. When I first brought up sex with my boyfriend, he said he wanted to wait. (Eventually, we did it). Just because your guy wants to wait doesn't mean he doesn't love you. It could be because he loves you that he wants to wait. I'm pretty sure in the UK it's illegal for you two to have sex. Maybe he wants to wait until it's legal. Or it could be for other reasons altogether. Your guess is just as good as mine. The nest thing for you to do is to ask him.
I hope this helped!
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A
male
reader, Cerberus_Raphael +, writes (21 November 2010):
I think he may partly be worried about the legality of a sexual relationship with you. It is not completely unheard of for someone to wait for sex, it is the wiser choice, there are more men willing to make that choice than you think.
I hope that helps.
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 November 2010): I applaud this man. He's waiting for the right time and not letting his hormones drive his decision making. He's using both his REAL head and heart on this and I would for sure admire that if I were you. This guys sounds great...be patient :)
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