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Should I chalk it up to a vulnerable night of drinking?

Tagged as: Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (21 November 2010) 4 Answers - (Newest, 25 November 2010)
A male United States age 41-50, *oogie4 writes:

Two weeks me and my GF broke up. I recently ran into her, and we went out for drinks.

NExt thing I know, we hooked up later that night.

Even though we have broken up, she still came by and we had an awesome night.

So what am I to think now, moving forward? Is she telling me it will be a casual, sex only thing while she continues to date others, or maybe it was her being vulnerable during our night out during drinks? Or maybe she's still in love with me, and waiting for me to make the next move?

Thanks

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A male reader, boogie4 United States +, writes (25 November 2010):

boogie4 is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Thanks all for your king advice. I know what I have to do, it is just so damn hard. I'm not in the right mind to start dating, so I will focus on work.

The thing that bothers me the most I suppose, is that I guess I'm just now realizing she was ready to give this up months ago. So now, in retrospect, I feel stupid because not only did I not see it coming, I have just opened myself up to her more, letting her know she has the upper hand.

No more...if she wants to date and explore, I must accept it.

Once again thanks, I'm glad there are folks out there that are offering their advice on matters like these.

It's always easier said than done when your friends say to you "just get over it."

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A male reader, boogie4 United States +, writes (25 November 2010):

boogie4 is verified as being by the original poster of the question

She seems like she's still upset and won't share any info.

She's flirting, so I should I just keep it moving I guess

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A male reader, boogie4 United States +, writes (25 November 2010):

boogie4 is verified as being by the original poster of the question

She is the one who broke up with me. We both are kind of confused, but i know that she's still flirting online and making sure she see's someone during the holiday weekend.

She doesn't know that I know. I guess my best thing is move on? I want her, she knows it, yet she seems like she's fine looking for something else. It hurts more because know that I know what she's up to.

Maybe I'm just playing myself. She kissed me goodbye before we left, and of course she's been for hours now and I haven't heard a word. I guess that's why we're broken up lol.

So why'd she sleep with me?

I should have said hell no....

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A female reader, Abella United States +, writes (21 November 2010):

Abella agony auntI don't know why you broke up. And if the reasons you broke up are still unresolved.

But sexually she is not repulsed by her, so that could be a positive sign.

However Sex is sometimes the result, when resolve is weakened by a few drinks, juxtaposed with familiarity (the known v the unknown). Sadly it may mean nothing. And if so it cheapens what was an awesome night for you.

It seems you still find her very attractive, and would like her back. Are there any issues or things you need to work on or resolve that precipitated the earlier breakup? You still need to keep those in mind or they will be deal breakers again if not dealt with.

You know her really well. If you have even an inkling that she might like to resume the relationship, then i'd suggest you Call her. Tell her how much you enjoyed an awesome night with her. If her response is no or undecided then accept it, and don't push it. At least she will know you are still interested if you tell her that is so.

If the response is positive then suggest a night out for dinner, but take it slowly and quietly. .

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