A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I need peoples opinions here... Do u think its slutty to sleep with someone a week into the relationship, if one of the people are virgins? ....If yes what do you think is an apropriate amount of time to wait? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Tony Jo +, writes (20 September 2009):
A week into a relationship is not enough time to know someone, and it would be Slutty to this old timer. the amount of time is after you have dated eight to twelve mounts and he / she has put a ring on your finger and stood before God and witnesses and said I DO!
A
female
reader, Artemesian  +, writes (20 June 2007):
 It's all about whats right for you. If you value your virginity then make him wait - like people have been saying it will only ensure he is the right one to be sleeping with and make it all the more fun if you do end up doing it. A lot of people (myself included) look back and want to take back their virginity or change the timing of losing it as they made a rash and maybe careless decision in the heat of passion. Ignore the whole slutty issue though, that is just worthless junk society has put on women over centuries and centuries of sexism and double standards.
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A
female
reader, TasteofIndia +, writes (19 June 2007):
 Do I think it's slutty? No. Do I think it's smart? No.
I made my boyfriend wait for three months before I let him sample the goods, and I was a virgin. I wanted to make sure that he was in for the longhaul and not just after booty. Those first few months were lots of fun, there wasn't a lot of pressure and we got to know each other. He fell for me hard without the sex (as I, him). I know that he would've waited for three YEARS.
Get to know each other. Have fun! Sex is supposed to be special and between two people who love each other. Trust me, everyone whose had sex before will tell you that it's best with the people you love. Take your dear sweet time.
Kissing, making out... SO MUCH FUN. Enjoy it while you can, when it doesn't have to lead to sex.
I think a week is way too soon... you'll know when you're ready though. Your virginity is your business, and no one can tell you when to lose it. However, my opinion is that you and your boyfriend (if that is who we're talking about here.) take the time to make a solid relationship.
Make sure you're as worth it to him as he is to you.
Good luck, sweetness.
xxIndia
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 June 2007): I wouldn't use the word "slutty." But what its definitely much too soon. Most men have more respect for a woman who doesn't hop in the sack with them so quickly.
Consider: you barely know someone you have dated for a week - even if you had met every day of that week. You don't (and can't) know whether you are both compatible. True you CAN talk about what you both have in common, and what your aims and goals, values, too, are. But important as talking is - and good communication IS very important - it takes time to see the person you are dating under different circumstances as time goes on - what is he like if he's had a bad day at work, for instance? Or, how does he act when he's with you and also visiting family and/or close friends? Basic character traits emerge over time.
In short, its a good idea to wait until you have been dating at least a month before getting into sex.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 June 2007): Hi, if you want to sleep with this guy because you are in a relationship then waiting won't do any harm. If you can potentially fall in love with him, then you shouldn't be thinking about how long to wait, as it will come naturally. By all means talk about it, but there is no need to put it in a schedule, when you know that after you have shared plenty of romantic time together it becomes increasingly sexual and you will know when it is ok. Just remember to enjoy safe sex!
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A
male
reader, DV1 +, writes (18 June 2007):
 Personally, I think that it's incredibly wrong. You two are just getting to know each other at this point. It wouldn't make any kind of sense to sleep with him unless you plan on being
a) his sex toy from now on
b) the word of the town
c) the one night stand
d) never seen by him again
DV1
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A
female
reader, flower girl  +, writes (18 June 2007):
 No one can tell you when it is right to sleep with someone you just have to go with what is right for you, all i can say is that before i met my husband i slept with a couple of people very quickly into the ralationships and they never lasted that long but when i met my now husband i waited three months and he says he had alot of respect for me for making him wait that long and he feel in love with me because of it, ok we have had our ups and downs like most but we have been together thirteen years this year.
Take care.xx.
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