A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Ok, question for ya...! Is it always left for a guy to pay while you're dating? Or even afterwards when you make it official?!? I ask this because a few of my guy friends joke around and say..."Nah, I'd rather stay single. It costs a lot to have a girlfriend." Lol. I don't want a guy to think I'm dating him because of where he takes me or how much he spends on me. Yet, I do like to save a dollar! Lol. But again, is it always left for the guy to pay? Or should offer to pay once in awhile? For example: I have to go to a museum (class assignment) I mentioned it to him and he invited himself. We'll just start the date earlier... He's driving and obviously paying $3 for parking. I get in for free w/student ID and he pays $7. What to do? I couldn't say no..plus, it would be kinda nice. Reply to this Question
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (20 January 2009): Only in the dating stages... once you've been out enough times to know each other's numbers by heart and SHE has a pack on Tampax in HIS bathroom... then it is safe to stop courting and start paying TOGETHER. Half and half, unless you either feel generous or it's a special occasion.
Flynn 24
A
female
reader, MommyOfOne +, writes (20 January 2009):
 I actually think it should be the other way around. I believe that in the early dating, a man should be a MAN and reach into his pockets and pay for the date. After a few years, if the woman wants to treat her man with paying, that's ok. But, not for a very long time. But, I do agree with the first person. His birthday should be the only exception.I have lived in the south since I was 7. I have never dated a guy who would even let me look at my purse, let alone go into it to get my wallet. Never dated a guy who didn't open doors and car doors EVERY time, even after years. I don't think I'm old fashioned or being outrageous. Its called chilvary. And as years go by, its dying. Because women want to be treated and seen as equals. But there are just certain areas of a relationship that a woman should not go, because it is INDEED her mans job. Like to pay for dinner and a movie.Now, you say you feel weird because you asked him to come. If you really feel like you should, (I wouldn't) offer to pay. If he takes the offer, then, your stuck paying his way. Myself, honestly, would be put off by a guy letting me pay his way. I don't know if he would get a second date. But that just goes back to what I said at the top.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 January 2009): Is it always left??? Shouldn't it be right???Anyway, Plexi is right on the dot with her reply.But, every relationship I've been in I have paid.As far as I know, and what I've been taught, whoever the man is in the relationship, should Always pay.It should always be his honor, privilege, and pleasure to pay for his lady. :-)
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 January 2009): There's nothing wrong with asking to pay or go dutch, though if the guy really likes you he's usually adamant bout paying for the whole thing in the earlier stages of the relationship. I'm a uni student at the moment (so not much extra spends!) and my boyfriend who've I just started seeing is already graduated and earns enough to take us out- but that doesn't mean I'm scrounging- far from it! There's something chivalric about a guy offering to pay but if your relationship develops feel free to ask to split/pay for you both once in a while.
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A
male
reader, The Gentle Man  +, writes (20 January 2009):
 First dates, guys pay. But it is courteous if you offer to pay half. You might end up having to pay half but generally he will insist on paying.From there on you will generally split unless its an occasion.In a commited relationship then I have no idea.
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A
female
reader, Plexi  +, writes (20 January 2009):
 Guys should pay if they are the ones inviting you. if the girl wants to........or its early in the relationship they should split it. And of course if its his bday,she should pay. Once the relationship is solid,i.e. long term commitment or marriage then yes the man pays
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