A
female
age
26-29,
*opelessromantc007
writes:BIRTHDAYS ARE A BIG DEAL…I wake up to the sun shining through my bed room window, the sky is clear, and it’s another beautiful morning. My soul is filled with such a sweetness today I’m at peace and my body is relaxed. But also I woke up to a flutter of thoughts that my mind wont let go, I try to push them away, but my mind wont let it go until I process these thoughts SO here goes…Truthfully some things aren’t a big deal, and some things that aren’t big deals to some, are to others. I think I’m learning to accept my own feelings instead of ignoring them, or allowing the enemy to tell me it doesn’t matter , because I’m not important . With this new attitude brings a new kind of freedom it allows me to be more open and transparent instead of hiding because of fear or shame.Every girl dreams of being on the receiving end of a beautiful bouquet of flowers. The ones that are left on your doorstep when you least expect it, those are the most perfect moments. I don’t know why gifts and flowers, cards and candies are so important, but I do know that I don’t know of one woman who doesn’t wish to be on the receiving end of such affection. A thoughtful gesture brings. I remember most things in great detail and when I think of those memories I am transported back to a very vivid memory replay of past events. Ladies, the expectations we hold when it comes to our men are sometimes so incredibly over the top, and when they don’t come through we feel disappointed, to say the least.A friend and I were walking one night, and talking about the pets we’ve had. I told him that I had never had a pet before, that I really wanted a puppy someday. He said “Awww just wait and see what I’ll get you for Christmas” I thought it was a sweet thing to say , and logically I knew he would not be getting me a puppy for Christmas , but knowing that, and hoping are two different things . Of course I still hoped he would surprise me with a cute little puppy - because that’s what all girls want…Another night about three months ago we were walking down town, we passed that new age shop displaying tons of beautiful rock crystals , again he says “I know what I’ll get you for your birthday, those rock crystal candies” Again I thought that was so sweet. Even though those darn candies cost under 50 cents, it’s not the price of the gift. It’s the thought of the gift that matters, needless to say I didn’t receive any rock crystal candies for my birthday, nor a card or flower, nor a Happy Birthday call nor a damn face book comment that says “Happy Birthday Crystal” Do you see where I’m coming from ladies??…So last week we were standing in a long line at the food bank, (of all places) just laughing joking around, making conversation. I mentioned to the Guy that I wanted the crystal rock candies for my B-day but mostly I was just bringing it up as a “remember the time when” sort of thing, but He took it a bit more seriously… Irritated he says “Sometimes people just say things…” And he’s right apparently they do. Then he went on about how he would love to get me a gift for my birthday and said he’d go and get the candies. That’s when I told him that I didn’t say that because I wanted him to go and get me a gift, Because as much as I wanted something, ANYTHING that might be a symbol of our friendship, that proves he actually does care about me, and that this isn’t a one-sided friendship. As much as I did want to be thought of , I didn’t want something from someone who felt any sort of pressure to get me something rather than just wanting to. But again my birthday came and went and he never even mentioned it or even took the two seconds to leave me a lame “Happy Birthday Crystal” Facebook comment! Do you see where I’m coming from ladies?So the day after my birthday, we find ourselves walking about down town and decided to take a look in that cookey but super awesome shop Merch Bot. they had a ton of funny little toys and trinkets and gift you could probably give someone as a joke to make them laugh. I mentioned out loud that it was a good store to get little gifts. Then he picks up a rubbery unicorn with a glow in the dark horn and says “ I have a friend back home who would love this, it would make her laugh, if I sent it to her.” That was just icing on my No birthday, Birthday cake!!! I want a damn unicorn!!! No, not really. I’d rather have a pony like Beckey.lol. I couldn’t tell if he said that to hurt me, of if he’s totally clueless, I really don’t think he’s clueless , I feel like he just doesn’t give a rip, and maybe a little lame after the lavish gifts I gave him, for Christmas and his B-day, and sad that in his eyes I am not worth spending a $1.00 on even though I think he knew how important it is to me. This is one memory that will be hard to forget, and maybe even become one of those sad stories I use to make people laugh someday. Haha. Don’t get me wrong if he had another birthday tomorrow I’d spoil him all over again 1. because its fun giving people gifts. and 2. Because I’m crazy about him, and that’s what defines me as a terribly hopeless romantic. The cherry on top of all this is that the other night we got in a conversation about what it means to hold hands with someone then he explains to me that holding hands means more that just friends. Then the next night we’re talking and he tells me how he and this girl hold hands A lot, I get real quiet…he ask’s me what I’m thinking about but can’t seem to figure it out!? It’s things like this that make you go Hmmm. It makes me re-evaluate how close I will allow myself to be to him. He has a “Girlfriend” that he’s breaking up with, and now him and this other girl are obviously more than just friends, he said it himself. I guess it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure this all out, but what it comes down to is I love him, a lot, and don’t understand why he didn’t show me he cares about our friendship, and me by dong something special for me to acknowledge my birthday? The only reason I came up with is that he really doesn’t care, but I think we are good friends so I was confused.-Miss Hopeless Romantic
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (20 January 2009): The first thing you need to know about guys... is we are absolutely TERRIBLE with dates.
We would barely remember our own birthdays if it wasn't hammered into us since birth.
I barely know my sisters' and the rest of my family's birthdays.
In fact its not really until they say their birthday is coming up that I know.
This why we men need palm pilots for EVERYTHING. It's not an insult. It's just we aren't so good at remembering these things.
Flynn 24
A
female
reader, kitty_3 +, writes (20 January 2009):
 Maybe he knew for awhile and felt like you were pushing him with all the little hints...? or he didn't get the hints and was then angry when you semi-confronted him...?
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