A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I am falling for a male colleague 20 years my senior. We are both married and I know he loves his wife and she is pretty stunning.We have started texting and it is becoming quite sexual. He tells me things like he is feeling randy etc. We have also said we love each other by text.I'm not sure how deeply to respond as he is in quite a high position at work and I'm not really in his league.He senses that I am not ready to go further as I also love my husband but he has intimated that we will have sex in the future and he will wait until I feel ready.It is very exciting and flattering and I think he is flattered as I'm so much younger than his wife. My normal, mundane life has become so much more exciting waiting for the texts each day but I do feel I am leading him on as we've done nothing yet!!Do you think he is just using me as a game or that he sees there is a future for us even if I am just the 'other woman' (I really don't think he would leave his wife for me)?I love my husband and don't want to risk this for a pointless fling.Should I listen to my head or my heart?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 March 2010): I think the other aunts are wasting their breath telling you not to stray. From what you have written you are eager to get f@cked by this married man, he knows it and so do you.then when you land your sorry ass on the street Post again , then I would advise0 why you shouldn't have betrayed your hb. Then when it is too late you may just realise it would have been better to put a lock on it rather than giving it away. Trust I made some sense. Your itch bet your legs can be curbed only if you want to and boy you know that you want it scratched.
A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (31 March 2010):
 You are standing on dangerous ground. Better get away before the ground pulls you down under.
Since you know the risks involved , you stand to lose everything for a stupid fling, you should listen to your head .
Don't be blinded by those excitements. It can kill.Refocus your attentions back into your marriage.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (31 March 2010):
Wake up. Go home to your marriage and work on it. He's just going to use you.
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A
female
reader, AuntyEm +, writes (31 March 2010):
 Sounds as if your going to be a 'booty call'. If things go much further, you could find yourself out of a job. Believe me, it sounds as if this man is determined to get what he wants...and when he's had it, he will wanna cover the evidence.
Tell him anything to get rid of him. Weigh up the excitement and flattery you feel from this 'liason' against the end of your marriage, possibly losing your home, getting a reputation as the 'office bike' and possibly losing your home!. All seriously realities should you go through with this.
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A
female
reader, sweetiebabes  +, writes (31 March 2010):
 I am separated for 4 yrs and I was into a relationship before with a married man who was older than me, I know too he loves his wife and family, and never I ever even think he'd leave them for me. I fell deeply in love with him but at the end of the road,I feel hurt and devastated.
I think you have a good life with your husband. Don't spoil your marriage. You know what is right and wrong, please do the right thing for yourself and for your family, don't get involve into something that you will completely regret after.
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A
male
reader, twinlab99  +, writes (31 March 2010):
 Serioulsy, if you're ready to cheat, just get divorced. It's not fair to his wife or your husband. Just get divorced, and then you can be with him. The pain will be so much less than either of you finding out of the cheating...and let me tell you....they will find out.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 March 2010): if you love your husband, then listen to your head.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 March 2010): Do what is right and avoid this! your husband loves you and you should keep that commitment.Because later on you will regret it! This man, your boss should know he is doing wrong. Because your so young he knws he can use you for his pleasure! By all all means AVOID THIS!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (31 March 2010): You answered your own question! He is doing this to get his kicks off. He wants the attention, just like you do, but he's not going to take the step to create a relationship.
Any fling is pointless, and you already know that. yes, the texts are exciting, but take that energy and channel it into your relationship with your husband. Saying I love you in a text is about as serious as Robin Williams' standup. It means nothing!
I don't understand what makes women want to be the other woman. The guilt, the stress, the resentment, not to mention that you wreck your whole life just for him to never leave his wife. Its not worth it!
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A
female
reader, YourDestiny11 +, writes (31 March 2010):
 Leave him alone ur both married. Put urself in his wifes shoes or ur husbands shoes. Wuts wrong with u. Do u not know the meaning of marriage. If he has a brain he wont leave his wife. Both of you should get some morals.
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