A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I know a long list of people are going to tell me to use a condom but will ask this anyway. Is it rude for a guy to pull out and cum all over you if birth control wasn't discussed before sex? I say it is and he says it isn't.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 October 2008): Rude? I don't think so. What you experienced was the consequence of not discussing birth control with your partner before getting involved. If a guy isn't wearing a condom, and isn't sure you are on any type of birth control yourself, he's likely going to pull out. When guys do that, they usually just let their sperm go on your stomach because it's the easiest place to do it. It's not being rude. He just did what he thought he had to. Now if he had jumped up and did that in your face, I would agree that's rude and unnecessary. Next time discuss birth control and make your wishes known, rather than leaving everything to chance.
A
female
reader, TraceyAmes  +, writes (24 October 2008):
 I am probably not qualified to answer this question as I am still a virgin and never had sex with or without a condom or using the withdrawal method. From what I have learnt in sex education at school and also from what my mother has told me, I wouldn't even dream of using the withdrawal method to begin with.
If you friend or lover thinks that by cumming over your tummy will prevent getting pregnant, then you had better think again. This method is the most unreliable of all methods and excessive use will undoubtedly lead to a pregnancy. There can be some semen in his precum and if he is just a fraction late in withdrawing, then you are in real trouble. If he cums on your tummy or vulva, his cum can still find its way inside you.
But to answer your question; no. I don't think it is rude. He has to cum somewhere and he hasn't got much time to decide where he wants to squirt it.
Hope this has been some help.
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A
male
reader, Cowboy  +, writes (24 October 2008):
Did he miss your mouth? :D
Seriously though, from a guy's perspective, he probably just did what he thought was the safest thing under the circumstances.
While the whole thing about sperm being present in precum etc is true, it was still exponentially safer for him to not cum inside you. Not safe by any means, but safer than the alternative by a huge margin.
He wasn't being rude, he just wanted to minimise the risk as much as he could under the circumstances.
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (24 October 2008):
Yes it is rude, but if you are having sex with a guy who knows that little about you that he doesn't even know about your birth control situation - and you let guys that hardly know you have sex with you without a condom then he is hardly going to feel like he has to treat you like a lady.
If you act cheaply and have sex with out a condom then you are going to be treated cheaply.
Good Luck!! xx
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A
female
reader, epifanatical +, writes (23 October 2008):
 forget feeling rude over it, its not a very reliable form of contraception to begin with. Precum almost always does ooze out of a guys penis when he is hard and erect, and can get you pregnant, so its advisable to wear a condom if your not on the pill.
Your guy prolly thought he was doing the right thing in this case by pulling out, and although it can be messy and the chance of pregnancy is low, it still can happen, and im assuming a person of your age does not want to end up pregnant, so pls do consider condoms at least. :)
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A
female
reader, aunty_rach +, writes (23 October 2008):
simple...use a condom. you are both silly to not use one as pre-cum can still get you pregnant!
as for the cumming on you, some guys and gals like to do that, so maybe it is normal for him? maybe he enjoys it. but if you don't then you need to tell him.
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