A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:im 13 and me and bf dont have sex but he fingers me and i gave him a blow job....is a blow job actually sex or do you have to put the penis in the vagina??? plz answer me soon!!!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 October 2009): sexual activities include:
oral sex (blowjobs)
fingering
handjobs
viginal penetration
(what other forms are there, memory escapes me right now)
in MY mind these are forms of sex, so YES sex is well SEX. IT is merely different forms of sexual activity- one external and one internal.
sometimes the way it is perceived baffles me too
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 October 2009): No its not sex
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (6 October 2009): Here's one simple way to tell if it is sex: If a teacher was caught doing it with a student, would they get fired?
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A
female
reader, HereAreMyTwoCents +, writes (4 October 2009):
 Most of the time that people say "we had sex" what they are trying to say is "we had vaginal intercourse" but of course people don't say it that way, the just say we had sex. But there are many types of "sexual activities" besides "vaginal intercourse" Both the "oral sex" which you gave your boyfriend and his fingering of you, are examples of other kinds of sexual activity. So, on first thought, no a blow job is not actually "sex" but it IS a type of sexual activity. However, if the question you are really trying to ask is "Am I still a virgin?" Yes, you are still a virgin. You only "lose your virginity" when the penis goes into the vagina.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 October 2009): Giving someone oral sex (hello...oral SEX) is SEX, unless your the president of the United States, and want you wife to get elected next.
Sexual activity is sex... fingers in vigina, penis in butt, penis in vigina, you giving him a bj or hand job... all sex...
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A
male
reader, LessonsLearned +, writes (4 October 2009):
Yes it's sex, but since there's no vaginal penetration with the penis your technically a virgin.
Sweetheart, you are too young to be doing this stuff. You'll understand what I mean in 3 years and you look back at 13 year olds. Give yourself some more time to just be a kid for a little while longer. You have to learn to say "No". Otherwise your gonna end up the plaything of every guy you like. And that is just not cool. If he loves you he'll be upset but he won't go away. Trust me on this one.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 October 2009): Yes and no. Oral sex is sexual activitiy penis is vagina means you are no longer a virgin so that is in my mind sex.
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A
male
reader, killerek9 +, writes (4 October 2009):
hi I would like to answer your question , sex is sex weather it is oral sex fingering or vaginal/anal penetration if you're trying to figure out weather you're still a virgin or not sorry to say that your virginity is your inossense and any kind of sex is taking it away virginity is actually a psycological thing not so much fisical hope my answer helped
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A
male
reader, softtouchmale2003 +, writes (4 October 2009):
 That's a question that's been plaguing the country since Bill Clinton was in office.
The short answer is, its sexual activity, therefore technically its sex.
Vaginal penetration is another form of sexual activity, and therefore its sex too.
However, you shouldn't be doing these things at your age. Playing with your sexuality at your age can have deleterious effects on you in adulthood. Having said that, no one can stop you from doing what you've already done.
So if you're going to engage in sexual activities, please be careful and indulge yourself safely and with the fewest possible risks.
At this stage you're responsible for your own health.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 October 2009): Yes oral sex is sex. What are you doing at 13 giving blow jobs any way? How nice and handy for him you are being. Do you think he really respects you? My guess is NO.
Do you respect yourself enough to stop treating yourself like a sexual servant? You don't have to keep doing this just because you started doing it. You can stop at any time and reserve sexual activity for marriage or when you are an actual adult and can handle the adult responsibilities and consequences a sexual relationship brings with it.
Take care.
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