A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi!So this is a very long story about and old crush.In 2009 I met this guy and I totally crushed on him for about 2 years in total. I never told him how I felt, but we were both really great friends. He once asked me out but I took at as a joke, and there were times when he wanted to meet up but I was too shy to say yes. I always thought that he's just joking around.Anyways, in 2011 I had to leave my country for a whole year to go work abroad. At first I really missed him and we almost chatted everyday on facebook. He had promised me that if i go back home for a holiday we would go out for a drink. But then there was a time were we stopped talking, and later I realised that he had found a girlfriend. :(I eventually got over this guy and by the time my year abroad was over and I was back home for good, I had 2 other boyfriends. Now, last week, guess who spoke to me on facebook again?? Yes, him!!! He is currently abroad with his girlfriend, the same as I was (to work for a year), and he had re activated his facebook. He asked me how i was doing and we spoke for hours!! In the middle of our conversation he actually confessed to me how much he liked me and how much he wished we were boyfriend and girlfriend! He said that he never like my bestfriend (because that's what i thought), and he said that he regrets not asking me out again!!Anyways,what should i do? Should i keep on speaking to him or should i stop?? I'm really falling for him again, but the problem is that he is still with his girlfriend. He only speaks to me when he's alone and deletes all our conversations so that no one can see them!! He keeps joking around that he will someday marry me, and keeps making jokes of us kissing or foolin around! I feel like i'm doing something wrong when I speak to him, but on the other hand I enjoy every minute of it and look forward to times where he's online!!! please help!!!!!
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female
reader, Red591  +, writes (20 March 2013):
 he deletes the conversations? what if you were her? you know if all us women stopped flirting and getting involved with guys who have girlfriends and wives then cheating would end. Keep your conversations on a friend level and don't talk for hours. That is emotional cheating on his part. He seems like the guy who is always looking at what he does not have as greener grass. If he is sincere about what he is saying then he would break up with her and make a serious play for you. If he does this then watch out though. You lose them like you get them.
A
male
reader, LivingWithBadDecisions +, writes (19 March 2013):
 No contact or no girlfriend.At the very leest(least?) you need to distance yourself until hes single.
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A
female
reader, llifton +, writes (19 March 2013):
 sounds to me like he kept trying to ask you out years ago but you kept blowing him off. why did you think he was joking?i'm not one to usually condone or advocate cheating. i think if this guy is serious about you, he needs to break up with his girlfriend before anything goes any further with you two. and if i were you, i would keep an emotional distance with him. being the other girl isn't a good feeling. don't get caught up in this unless he really wants to be with you. good luck.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (19 March 2013):
 He has a girlfriend. IF you were his girlfriend what would you want him to do?
He's deleting the conversations and keeping you a dirty secret from everyone because he's lying to his GF and clearly is emotionally cheating on her.
You are not cheating on anyone but if he was married to her and she filed for divorce you could be named as a respondent and cause... just saying.
So let me ask you another question... if he leaves her and comes to be with you... will you ever trust that he's not chatting up some new girl on facebook? or when he's not with you will you wonder if he's with another woman?
WILL you ever be able to trust a man that you know is capable of lying and cheating?
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