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female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: This will sound like a very, veru vain question, but I really need to know. Ok, so I'm the front woman in a band; I play guitar and sing. My bandmates are all guys. One of them is my BF. Anyway, the thing is, our music is good, I don't mean to sound like I'm blowing my own horn, but we've done pretty well.However, as I'm a girl, I've noticed how bands do better when there's a hot chick. And I'm definitely NOT hot. I'm about 5'6" and weigh like 136 lbs., as you can see I'm not really overweight BUT I want to lose like 15 lbs., especially since my lower body is heavier and still looks chubby. However, I'm very afraid that I'll end up flat chested. I've always had small B cup breasts, and I've lost like 20 lbs since high school... I still wear the same bra size, however I lost some roundness and even my boyfriend noticed.I don't want to lose whatever little breast tissue I have, since they make me feel womanly, small and all. I do admit ever since I was a little girl, I wished for big breasts, and despite the well-known disadvantages of big breasts, I still wish I had them. I prefer that to the disadvantages of small breasts. Especially since I have HUGE hips, so my small Bs look indeed very disproportioned.I'd never have surgery, though. I guess it's scary, and in my country, it's too expensive and the technology isn't as safe and advanced as in the US. So I don't know whether to lose weight or keep it, because of my boobs.Sigh, it's just hot girls in bands have advantages. And we once talked to this producer guy and he told us, subtly, that image is very important when you're trying to be successful, especially for women.If a band is good, does it make it better when there's a hot chick in it? It also worries me that if we succeed a bit more, my boyfriend will meet a lot of hot chicks in the business (he has a thing for girl musicians). I'm no Katy Perry, so what can I do? I look chubby from the waist down and small from the waist up. I hate my body, and feel very ugly when I'm on stage.Sorry if this question is stupid.
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female
reader, k_c100  +, writes (18 August 2009):
 Ok first of all losing weight is a bad idea, you are a perfect weight for your height! From the sounds of things, your body shape is small on top and larger on the bottom; so guess the first place you would lose the weight from? The correct answer is - your top half! So you would end up even smaller on top (bye bye B cups!) and look even larger on the bottom.
Exercise is going to be your only option - not to lose weight but to tone up. Even putting on a little weight in muscle will be better than losing weight! Buy some hand-held dumbells and look up some exercises for your bottom half. Womens Health magazine is good and they have a good website too. When I work out with weights I have two 1kg dumbells (very low weights stop you from getting bulky) and I do squats and lunges whilst holding the dumbells. This gives your legs and bum a great workout and improves your muscle tone.
I'm not sure what country your from but here in the UK, there is an actress (a pretty crap actress but she's on TV!) called Jennifer Metcalfe http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/showbiz/tv/soaps/article2123239.ece
have a look at that pic - she has a huge bum and wide hips with tiny boobs (I'm guessing 32A maybe a B). She is proof that you can look great and be successful with a body shape that is a little out of the norm!
It is all about your "look" rather than your personal body shape. When a record label is looking at a band, they talk about "image" but they dont mean the individuals image, they mean the cohesiveness of the overall band image. I dont know what type of music you guys play but your look needs to reflect that. You also need to be quirky, individual in your style. Again I'm not sure what country your from so I dont know if you have heard of these artists but they are currently very succesful in the UK - Florence and the Machine, La Roux and Little Boots. They are all female singers in bands, who are not especially beautiful but all have their own style. La Roux is very electro-pop, whereas Little Boots is kinda disco glam with a grungy twist.
You need to learn what clothes suit your body shape, what clothes you feel comfortable in and what you enjoy wearing. On stage you can be as outrageous as you like, so dont be afraid to try new styles and be adventurous! Look at Goldfrapp and The Yeah Yeah Yeahs, both fronted by women who are not "hot" in traditional terms but they are very unique and really go to town with their looks.
Forget about your weight - being skinny isnt going to get you a record deal. However looking unique and finding your own style (and making sure the rest of the band fits in with your style too) will make you stand out from the crowd.
But if your music is very Katy Perry or some generic pop sound like hers, then it is all fake tan, high heels and no more carbs for life!
A great image comes with success - pop stars spend a fortune on their image and have a team of stylists, hairdressers and make-up artists to make them look good. Try finding a pic of Lady Gaga before she was famous and you will see what I mean! If your sound is great then whoever signs you will get to work on your image, image is normally second to your sound!
I hope this helps and good luck!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 August 2009): Well, the brutally honest truth is that you will do better if you look hot. Is it fair, is it right? No, but unfortuantley its the truth. There are going to be a ton of other bands that are talented, and there are going to be other bands that are hot, but the ones that will make it are going to be the ones that have both.Wanting your breasts to grow isn't going to do anything. You can either accept them as they are, or look into surgery seriously. Or why don't you just wear a padded push up bra? If you want to lose weight, then excersize and eat right. Start tanning, use fake tanner, use some whitening teeth strips, get your hair done, and go invest in some good makeup.
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A
female
reader, Jayney Y  +, writes (18 August 2009):
 Can't see what you're worried about. There's a whole lot of people in the music industry who look "hot" but have absolutely no talent whatsoever. If, however, you're music is kiddy lollipop crap, (eg: Britney Spears), then you probably need to buy yourself some fake tan, some really slutty outfits, a whole bucket load of make-up to deflect attention from the fact that your music is crap, and also get yourself a serious PR machine. Good musicians succeed on talent not looks. :)
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A
female
reader, hijacked_dignity  +, writes (18 August 2009):
 First off, I just checked your body mass index and you are completely average as far as your weight is concerned. You aren't "fat" at all. Second off, I am assuming that your band is no where near where the big bands are. I mean when you think of Katy Perry or Avril, these bands are huge. They have so many people behind the scenes making sure that everything is just right, including hair and makeup. You really can't compare yourself to these big name women, because it's easy to be in shape and always dolled up when you can pay people to do it for you. What really sets bands apart in the beginning is talent. Record companies are looking for something that sounds different and will make them money. Image isn't really an option because they basically are able to 'play-dough' you into however they want YOU to look. So even if you lost this weight which I really don't think you have to lose, or changed your breasts, they'd still want something else changed about you. So why not just stay who you are and wait for them to come along? It'll save you the hassle. It seems like you are worried too much about your body image and not enough about what music is really about. And that's sounding good. You should be investing this worry about your body into booking shows and adding to your fan base. Producers and record labels will worry about the image. Look at Hayley from Paramore. She had this huge gap in her teeth before concert sales were able to pay off for some dentistry.As far as your boyfriend is concerned, sorry to break it to you, but there is always going to be "hot" girls in the industry that you are in. Whether he is going to fool around or whatever with them has nothing to do with you. You could be the hottest girl there and if a guy is going to cheat, he'll find someone to do it with. So stop worrying about that aspect as well. My best advice for you is to not go with the surgery, and if you feel really uncomfortable with your body, just try some exercise every once in a while. You don't have to take drastic measures, just getting into shape a little more won't reduce your breast size. Do it because you want to, not because of your boyfriend or these silly worries about band image. You're way too early along to even be considering. that.
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