A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: im not 100 % sure what to do and thats why im here . A year ago i went on a date with a guy we both wanted the same out of life then , the date was good and we got on well but he always had an excuse for cancelling a 2nd date ( always a 'family problem' he has no kids its him his parents and brother . i told him we can just be friends ( due to his flakyness ) i personally think he suffers from social anxiety but is afraid to tell anyone it wouldnt bother me. Any way fast forward to now and he wants a 2nd date . I said yes but if he cancels then thats it no 2nd chance but over the last couple of week ive been thinking how ive changed and dont want the same as him anymore . Hes into marriage , kids proper family unit so called 'perfect family life' im not bothered for it im not bothered about being married or even having kids im not broody anymore a friend had a baby and i went to visit and there was no broodyness ( i have 1 teenager already) . im enjoying the single fun life , its like i know how to move on and he doesnt or is too slow to making big decisions and thinks everyone stays the same . Im now debating about this 2nd date im thinking ive got no feelings for him anymore . do i just go on the date and see how things are or just call it off ?
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female
reader, aunt honesty +, writes (23 August 2016):
Really is not point in wasting your time, you say he wants different things to you, but it has took him a year to go on a second date with you, Sweetie if he was really interested in you he would have made more off an effort.
A
female
reader, Ciar +, writes (23 August 2016):
I agree with not wasting time on another date. Whether he had an understandable excuse or was spinning a tale, you're not interested.
Life is short so why spend it doing something, or spending time with people you're not interested in?
No hard feelings. Wish him well and move on.
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A
female
reader, Anonymous 123 +, writes (23 August 2016):
You two don't sound compatible in any way.
He's flaky, you want different things out of life and a second date after a YEAR... That would be enough to put me off someone for good!! I personally don't think it's worth it.
Sounds like too much trouble when there's nothing really going to come off it
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (23 August 2016):
I would call it off and say thanks, but no thanks.
I don't see why you should waste any more time on this one.
And the the "flakiness" might be due to social anxiety, it might also just be due to him talking to SEVERAL girls, disinterest and boredom... neither a good reason to date.
Usually people date to see if the other person can/could be a goof future partner, but you seem to have written him off already so why bother? (nothing wrong in you having changed your mind).
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A
female
reader, fishdish +, writes (23 August 2016):
I guess it doesn't hurt to see him once-after all, you DID want a second date long ago! But I think you sound pretty disinterested, in which case, I wouldn't bother wasting both of your time.
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