A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I'm 26, and I'm married . Our relationship is pretty formal and not at its best. We barely have anything in common anymore and I'm not sure anymore what triggered this relationsihp in the first place...I met this older guy last year. He's 43 years old. He is divorced and has two kids (18 and 10). When we met the first time, it got really heated between us however we never really had sex. I found out I was pregnant and I knew it's my husband's child for sure as he was the only man I slept with (all my life!).The older guy felt the obligation to leave me alone with my pregnancy - he thinks my husband and I are separated which is partly true. He gets involved with another lady who has four kids and we no longer contacted each other.. Until a few days ago we were in touch again. Then last night, we met again for the first time in a year.. And yes, it was such a heated moment and for the first time I slept with him. It was great... Oh my I've never felt this way before... I've never enjoyed sex like this before... He is so gentle yet ... I can't describe it... I'm shaking all over now just from remembering how amazing it was last night.. After the blissful heaven we were in upstairs, we went downstairs (his house) and I met his son for the first time (10 year old). He's such a good kid and we got along very well. I also met his 18 year old last year (once).I was driving back home and thinking about this mess I'm in.. I have strong feelings for this older guy and his family is great.... But when I stepped into my house and saw my husband with my daughter waiting for me - I started crying... I couldn't tell him the truth coz that'll hurt him a lot.. But I couldnt' see a man I'm in love with there... Just a man who happens to be the father of my child...He is very worried about me and knows nothing... The older guy said he'll contact me sometime today - which I'm hoping he doesn't anymore because that'll help me forget about him.. I'm so confused... I'm a christian and I'm committing adultry and ENJOYING IT.. Help.. thoughts... Please..
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female
reader, curious0hot +, writes (2 February 2010):
 I also believe the older man just wants to have sex with you. Especially since he "left you alone" during your pregnancy. I think you should admit the fact that you cheated to your husband, and also that you don't know why you're with him anymore. It's the right thing to do.
A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (1 February 2010):
My thoughts are that this older man is using you for sex and nothing else. Notice how there have been no real dates, no getting to know each other. Also notice how when he found out you were pregnant he was quick to make a run to another woman. Now you've had the child and you're still not happy in your relationship, he's taking advantage of you. Wake up. This won't last. And what happens when your husband does find out? You could wind up losing everything here. My other thoughts are that you and your husband have not been putting enough time into each other and that's why you've ended up like this. You must feel something, because if you didn't you wouldn't have broken down. So to sum up, if you want to be used by a mad for sex who should know better than to mess with a marriage, then you carry on and blow your marriage out the water. Or you could end it with him and start again with your husband and get to know him all over again. You owe it to your little girl to work on your marriage. If nothing changes, then leave. But don't be naive about this older man. It will give him a kick to know he has a younger, married woman around having sex with him. He doesn't love you. All the signs show he's just there for the sex.
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