A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:In love with my best friend... Should I stop seeing her?I went out with a close friend for a while and eventually she dumped me and broke my heart. We stayed friends, though it was really hard for me. She's currently got a boyfriend of 7 months. We're still very close and I see her everyday, but Ive fallen in love with her again. She leaves the country forever in 2 months. Do I tell her how I feel and stop seeing her, or *try* to enjoy the next 2 months of her company, though it will be really hard? Thanx x
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 May 2007): invite her camping and say your eyes look beautiful in the fire light and then slowly drop clues.
A
female
reader, bubbloo24  +, writes (9 May 2007):
 Very tricky situation... but going against a lot of what has been said... I believe you should tell her.
1) Because if you don't you'll feel a shadow over you for a long time saying " what if?..."
2) Even if she rejects you, you will be able to start moving on from that point as you won't be seeing her as much.
3) If she's your friend, she'll tell you the truth. And if she's your friend she'll be gentle with you, what ever you feel for her and will stay your friend no matter what.
What have you got to lose?
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A
male
reader, forgonepath  +, writes (9 May 2007):
After reading your message I immediately felt that I should respond to this, but I don't know what to say. I am in the EXACT same situation. She's leaving the country soon and I absolutely love her. My mind was always telling me not to tell her since it'll ruin our friendship, but I couldn't stand the pain and suffering and figured I'd regret it for the rest of my life if I didn't tell her. I'd always think "what if?" So four days ago I went ahead and told her. Her response, "we're best friends and I know you better than anyone else, of course I've known this all along." So basically she knew I felt that way but didn't address the issue because the feeling wasn't mutual. So I'm sorry to tell you this, but if you are in fact best friends with this girl, she already knows. But my advice would be to talk to her and get it out in the open. You might not get the answer you're looking for, but at least there will be no "what if's." Also, since you guys are best friends it wouldn't ruin your friendship; my experience is stuff like this doesn't really come between best friends. So best of luck, and hope you get the answer you're looking for.
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A
male
reader, sleepyhollow  +, writes (9 May 2007):
If you love her, let her go without trying to make it difficult for her to go.
If she's really your friend, she already knows how you feel toward her, and if it is meant to be, it'll happen that she'll tell you if she returns those feelings. But you have to try your hardest to get over her, or at least get on with your life. That doesn't mean you have to stop loving her though, so you just keep on doing that and maybe save up enough money to go visit her one day.
If you're lucky she'll move out of the country and meet other people who are also compatible with you, and through her you may meet the real love of your life. Anything can happen.
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A
female
reader, cd206 +, writes (9 May 2007):
 I don't think that telling her how you feel would achieve anything. She'd still have a boyfriend and she'd still be leaving the country, probably feeling bad about breaking your heart because she can't return your feelings for her.
What it comes down to is if you can live with yourself if you don't tell her. One of you will end up hurt by it, be it you having to watch her leave or her having to deal with having hurt you. I don't want to make assumptions but if you are really in love with her I wouldn't upset her last few months with you and I would sacrifice my own feelings.
Is that the right thing to do? Well everyone is different and I don't know either of you but my instinct tells me that telling her would be a bad idea.
CD
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A
male
reader, rossiboy confessions +, writes (9 May 2007):
 hi , you question is one which will divide the whole world people have different points, i have been there myself and i tell you its hard your heart says tell her how u feel but ur head says i can not coz i lose her forever.
i feel at some stage before she goes you tell what she means to you and how you do feel if you can transpond that love and be happy for her and have a loving friendship till she gone it takes a big person and big heart to do that, i do say follow your heart because i do not want you regretting the rest of your life thinking i should of told her how i felt? be aware tho of the actions , you can say how you feel and go i love you i wish you all the best i want you to be happy and you always be in my heart no matter where you are. its down to you to make decision tho because i cannot tell you if its best for you or not its your heart mate and i know what your going thru i say tell her just before she goes. all the best ross
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