A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I am in love with my flatmate. We have lived together for a few years and have known each other since we started Uni 7 years ago. She has been having emotional problems with her ex boyfriend who messed her around and is still trying to string her along. I don't feel I can tell her how I feel and risk adding to her emotional troubles if she doesn't feel the same, but it is really bringing me down. What can I do?
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male
reader, DV1  +, writes (4 June 2007):
 Right now, she needs a good friend to console her. Help her heal, and don't take advantage of her sadness. Down the road, when she's happy, tell her how you feel. Just know to take it slow.
DV1
A
female
reader, bubbloo24  +, writes (4 June 2007):
 If she's your mate, be there for her all you can. She obviously needs comfort.
I wouldn't tell her right now how you feel. Be there for her as much as you can, but what ever you do, do NOT see this as just a way to get into her - by being a friend coz she will see right through you. Just look after her and talk to her when she needs it. She'll probably see a caring side to you and MIGHT see you in a different light but GIVE IT TIME.
Hope I helped.
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A
reader, I Dont Lie +, writes (4 June 2007):
 Whether or not she feels the same way or not, this is definitely the wrong time to tell her how you feel. You want to be sure that she really likes you for you before you both get into anything serious, not just because shes all messed up at the moment and needs someone to be there for her. Give her the time she needs, the time to heal, be there for her when she needs you although you shouldn't be smouldering, and then hopefully she'll realise that she likes you more than just a friend.
Having said that, I must warn you about the repercussions of getting into a flatmate/housemate relationship. If things go bad between the both of you, it will be very hard to keep things amicable in the house for the both of you and the rest of the other housemates (if there are any other housemates that is). Believe you me, Im speaking from experience here. All I can say is think about this rasionally before you make any decisions.
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