A
female
age
51-59,
*opefulfairy
writes:I've been with the same guy 6 years, he never wanted kids because of problems with his child that put him off, from his previous marriage. I ignored him.. now I feel nothing but resentment and don't fancy him and avoid sex but feel very unfulfilled and unhappy. I'm 38. Last year we moved from england to scotland so I could be nearer my family, But he has given up all his friends and all he has is me....and I'm having serious doubts to whether I should stay with him because I don't fancy him anymore. Does sex mean everything?? I just don't know what to do and he has nowhere to go without me? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Stayc63088  +, writes (11 April 2008):
 No, sex does not mean everything. It is an integral part to a relationship though. To me it sounds like you are no longer in love with this man. Aside from hurting his feelings, what reason do you have to stay with him? You clearly do not have feelings for him anymore, you should leave him. Good luck.
A
female
reader, Mistify  +, writes (11 April 2008):
 POOR YOU!
This is such a tough situation to be in, and i'm really sorry for it.
I've been there.
I've had long relationships, that seemed to be great, and, towards the end of them, i was also full of resentment and totally unhappy. Sometimes you are so overwhelmed by these feelings that you could easily pack up and go in that instance, however, sometimes are just NOT THAT BAD.
The one thing you need to assess, is if this is a pattern in your life.
""You have the chase of a difficult guy, and, knowing everything you know, once you have him, you start becoming complacent, and bored. Eventually, your perpetual unhappiness manifests itself in the little tiny irritable things he does all day long????""
If this is not the case for you, then awesome.
Then my advice would be, to let him down easy, and as soon as possible. Relationships are based on two people having the same ideas about the BIGGER things in life (like having children etc). If you are unhappy, then there is no reason to drag this out. Your partner is a grown man, and he can go back to his friends if he wants.
HOWEVER, if you realize this as a pattern in your life, i would suggest you go to therapy.
This is how it was for me.
I realized, that all the situations (relationships) that failed, were more or less because of the same reasons, and i seeked help. I was sick of walking out of one relationship, into the next, and time after time, the same set of problems started to occur, and hey presto, the relationship ended... AGAIN. In therapy, i dealt with a pretty bunch of childhood issues, and since then, things have improved tremendously.
Anyway.
The choice is yours to make.
Good luck
PM me if you wanna chat some more
Love and Light
M
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