A
female
age
41-50,
*ookiemon77
writes:I'm getting married. But i'm very sad. I don't know why. I'm anxious and very scared about marrying this man. I love him, but i am scared that im making a mistake. I feel alone for some reason. We went to get our Marriage License the other day and technically we are married now until the officiant signs it. He changed his demeanour and started acting weird. He said you didn't tell me this was like this. I assumed that he knew since he's been married twice already. He said that I was running the show and felt that I dragged him there and kinda took advantage of him. Ever since we got our license he has been acting strange and distant. What do I do? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, maryA  +, writes (2 December 2009):
 listen darling and i dont want to sound harsh but if you truely wanted to marry him and him you, you wouldn't be writing on here! Marriage is a HUGE commitment and if there are any doubts at all in your head don't do it! Sorry for sounding harsh but i really don't want you doing something your not sure of! Marriage is sort of like a business deal, you need to be sure your doing the right thing or it will ruin you. You need complete commitment on both sides or the deal will fall through. It's your desision and i hope you do the right thing but i know that if i were you i wouldn't go ahead. good luck x
A
female
reader, k_c100  +, writes (2 December 2009):
 Dont go ahead with the wedding if you dont feel 100% certain about it. It sounds like you are both having doubts and there are problems in your relationship so the most important thing to do is work on these problems before you think about getting married.
Your wedding should be the happiest day of your life - you are supposedly marrying the man of your dreams, the man that makes you happier than anything in this world, he should be your best friend, someone who you cant wait to grow old with. If you dont feel like this and have doubts about this then dont go through with it - this commitment is for life and you really have to be sure that it is the right thing to do.
Talk to your boyfriend about how you are feeling, and get him to talk about the way he is feeling. Take some time to just be together and work on your problems - if things get better and are good for at least 6 months then you can start to think about marriage again.
I hope this helps and good luck!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 December 2009): He already was married twice? That one thing would be a red flag for me.
He told you draged him into this marriage, doesn't sound very encouraging to me. All these makes me thinking, if both of you reconsidering.
I would postpone wedding.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 December 2009): hey..dont worry!
just try talking him. Tell him honestly, what are u feeling about him.dont be sarcastic or rude. Just be natural, calm and polite. Tell him,,that its a question of your lives. tell him honestly what u dint like about him and as well as ask him whether he disliked anything bout u.
M sure..By conversation , things will resolve and u will get a better picture of all the issues.(if they really existS)
dnt gamble wid ur life..if u get some negative energy from him or u feel that u will not be happy...without fear.take ur steps back and reconsider ur decison.
u may get criticism..but remember its better to have criticism than having troublesome future.
wish u all luck!
Cheers!!
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A
female
reader, Sadnat  +, writes (2 December 2009):
 i dont think marrying him under these circumstances is a good idea, i feel you should be completely content and feel safe about your marriage as it is for life, and maybe he is also scared as he has been married before. think long and hard.
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A
female
reader, Honeygirl +, writes (2 December 2009):
 Hun, sounds like this is not a match made in heaven!! Why ARE you getting married??
I suggest that since you are unsure you put a stop to the process until you are 100% sure of what you are doing.
Sounds like your bf is feeling like you are.. apprehensive about the forthcoming marriage...
Rather postpone the affair until you are both sure of what you are doing...
It doesnt sound like you are in love with your bf or he in love with you....
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