A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:The statement that some women make that they have no problem with their man watching porn as they know he CHOOSES to be with them seems ridiculus to me...Dont these women realise that their man probbly has as much chance of being with a porn star as he doe of winning the lottery....pretty remote..Our men may love us but I feel any woman is a fool to think he wouldnt choose the body of a porn star (talking purely the physical part here ) over the avergae w/gf ...Therefore the statements ridiculous he didnt CHOOSE you over a porn star......he ad no other choice but to choose a woman like you as the porn star is not an option...Why do women try to delude themselves like this....and kid themselves that hes not getting somethng from porn that hes not getting from you.
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reader, anonymous, writes (22 August 2007): I think you may feel your boyfriend chooses porn over you.......if you have given him an ultimatum that you go or the porn goes and then you find porn, he has made a choice. Is that how you feel?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (21 August 2007): Of course a husband/boyfriend/wife/girlfriend is getting something from porn that they don't get from their significant other. So what? If you're that insecure that you're inclined to get jealous over pictures or movies then you need to ask yourself just what you really bring to a relationship that makes you worth while to begin with. If you think that movies and pictures can compete with you and win then you must not have that much to offer. Just because someone is looking at porn doesn't mean that they are 'choosing' it over you - not unless they're throwing you out of the house and carrying on a relationship with a magazine or movie CD. Porn is fantasy, and if you are angry and jealous over someones private thoughts then your problem with porn is just that - a problem with you.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 August 2007): I agree with the poster of this question 100%. men are just saying you're angry because they are not the ones affected by porn. If a man's wife masterbated to men porn stars & didn't have interest in sex with their husband, these men would have a different opinion. But like I say all the time, men are incapable of putting themselve's in anyone else's shoes and are only thinking in a way that benefits them & their penises. They don't care that it hurts us women..well some of us women. Other women are suppoosivly o.k. with it but I don't believe it for a second. How can you be o.k. with your man wanting to have sex with another woman? Especially some whore? Does it make you feel good that when he has sex with you he's imagining the porn star he jerked off to when you were out buying something to make for dinner? get real.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 August 2007): Johnny Depp isn't a porn star. He's a very talented, pasionate man. Let's say Ron Jeremy came to your door. o.K. no, I doubt you'd screw a porn star man. Either would I. Even if he looked good. That's the difference because men would do it. And I am still waiting for a man to tell me that he would turn Jenna Jameson away if she came to his door & wanted to screw him. Come on men, be honest here.
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female
reader, Basschick +, writes (8 August 2007):
 Perhaps you would choose to be Johnny Depp (or whichever movie star you find attractive) if you had the chance, but alas you do not and neither does your b/f have the chance to be with a porn star in reality. But he probably would if he could. You have taken a beating over your statements so I will not add further insult to your injury. Maybe try buying a Playgirl magazine and just casually start flipping through it in front of him some time and see if he comes unwound over it. If he does, then you may have a chance to help him understand your point of view. Then maybe the two of you can agree that if either of you is looking at porn, the other one doesn't need to know about it so there's no hurt feelings there. I'm sure he could do it when you're out shopping or away with a girlfriend at lunch one day. It doesn't have to be in-your-face. If that doesn't work, it may be time to find another boyfriend.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 August 2007): I agree with the poster in a way. However, I do not think that men would CHOSE a porn star over their g/f or wife. But I do think there is no doubt that if Jenna Jameson came to your man's door and told him she wanted to f**k his brains out, he'd be doing it in a second. Now, don't get me wrong, he wouldn't leave his g/f or wife for this hot, sex goddess, he would simply try to hide it from her. So men, try to imagine that scenario & tell me you would turn the porn star away, saying "no thanks, I'll have to pass on having my fantasy fulfilled with you because I love my girlfriend & would never cheat on her even if I could get away with it". Is this not why you men watch porn, so that you can imagine yourselve's having sex with these women? There is no other reason why you would watch it!! And no, I don't allow my boyfriend to watch porn because if he loves me why does he want to fantasize about screwing whores? I don't want to look at other men, especially porn star men. They are gross to me.
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male
reader, Jamer70  +, writes (8 August 2007):
 Im gonna have to agree with Dr Pete on this one that you seem to be projecting a hate and insecurity on your part, maybe a hurtful/failed past relationship which porn may have been the problem, and hurling your pain at woman who dont have problems with porn.
Now tell me why do you think a man would choose a porn star over a "real" woman. Does a porn star give him those back massages he loves?, Does she give him that warm feeling when she cuddels him?, does she cook his steaks just right? Does she know his favioute football team and player? NO.
The fact that you think men are so shallow that we would pick body over personality is insulting to us and you have issues with being choose over to believe we ALL are this shallow, as for most men the love of a good woman beats ALL. So no we wouldnt choose a porn star over a real woman.
I think you need to actually look at a porn to see these woman are NOT perfect as there is no such thing as the perfect woman, and m assuming your seeing these "perfect" woman in magazines, where they are airbrushed until they are not themselves anymore, and you look into this further.
Its bad that you came to this site nd insulted woman who dont have problems with porn like you do. I sounds to me that you have problems with it because of a past relationship and you should deal with this rather than taking you anger out on woman who are OK with porn and even use it as a sexual enchancer in their relationship.
Porn can satisfy BOTH MEN AND WOMAN. its not a men only world.
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female
reader, myp  +, writes (8 August 2007):
 ahhh tellulah and dr. pete said just about all of it. Ok first off, why do u care? if u dont want ur man watchin porn thats your business, your prerogative and your personal issue. I cant say i want my man to watch porn but in all honesty it doesnt bother me, its just fantasy. Why r u so hung up?"......he had no other choice but to choose a woman like you as the porn star is not an option" have u ever seen a porno? jus to let u know, a lot of the girls that do porn look strangely ordinary, just a personal observation for u. Oh and the last part "Why do women try to delude themselves like this....and kid themselves that hes not getting somethng from porn that hes not getting from you." Did this happen to you? If it did maybe u should go ask a question that pertains to your situation and stop accusing ppl u dont kno who are here to assist others with their emotional hardships. Im jus sayin, bein a complete B*@%& and making blanket statements to ppl who r just trying to help is not so cool.
-Myesha
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 August 2007): If the roles were reversed and 99% of porn was naked men instead of women and we women were always looking at or even preferred looking at perfect male bodies in place of our "mediocre" boyfriends, I don't think men would be too happy about that either.
My previous boyfriends have gotten jealous over me having girl magazines with guy of the month showing his chest. So you would expect them to not look at something of equal or more nudeness with girls if they can't handle me doing it.
But alot of guys have double standards, though.
I agree that it is inappropriate, if you are in a relationship to be looking at porn. And I don't know any girl who would be ok with this either.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 August 2007): Well I'm 17 and recently made a topic myself about finding my boyfriends been watching porn. I was very hurt by it but everyone on the site made me realise just because he had been watching it doesn't mean he doesn't love me.
And yes he did CHOOSE ME over pornstars as his friend is dating a pornstar [or so his friend says]. Just because he's been watching it, it doesn't mean he doesn't find me more attractive. He always tells me how much he loves me and how beautiful he thinks I am. He said he won't watch it anymore because he knew it upset me. I know he'd never cheat on me and if I think someones pretty I'll say 'She's quite pretty isn't she?' and I don't mind that he thinks they are attractive because they are.
I am a jelous person but a nice person on this site showed me the dove website and it shows that no one is perfect, and just from that made me feel alot better.
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female
reader, Unique1 +, writes (8 August 2007):
I hate the fact that my bf watches porn but they all do so i had to except the fact that once in a while he will do it. They all will. I would rather hear him tell me the truth than lie to me and say he doesn't when he actually does. I dont think your necessarly attaching these other girls opinion but that your just bothered and it doesn't make sence to you. However, as one girl said you fighting it could be long bottle.... I mean it took me forever to realize he will do it whether i knew or not, whether it bothered me or not.
I also don't like when they say oh he chooses to be with me its like okay he can watch that, look at whatever, as longs as he chooses me or is with me. I mean its not all about that- just because he is with you doesnt mean he should be doing some things. What i hate the most is when they say : he can be out and about-as long as he comes back to me- i hate to hear that!
Anyways, to make your life lil easier, try to accept the fact that your guy, my guy, anybody's guy will do it at times. I had to -it is reality!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 August 2007): I agree with Dr Pete, i couldn't of put it better myself!
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reader, anonymous, writes (8 August 2007):
Everyone has a right to their own opinion and I personally think you are quite wrong to criticise other women for having a different view than your own.
In fact, your message is rather sad, it speaks jealous and insecurity on your part and you are clearly hurting and you are taking that hurt out on pornography and anyone who supports it.
You'd do better to take a look at your own issues and your own failed relationships rather than criticize other people. You could start by at least trying to accept the idea that pornography doesn't affect all women in the same way as it has affected your life.
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female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (8 August 2007):
 Since the dawn of the internet the porn business became BIG business. Money talks. You will be fighting an uphill battle with this one. I think however you can't make such a blanket statement regarding other women's views on porn viewing. Sometimes looking at porn is something a couple enjoys doing together.
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female
reader, TELLULAH +, writes (8 August 2007):
 Or maybe we feel secure with our men and dont feel the need to rant over it.
Also who says he would choose the porn star over his G/F or WIFE. Do you think most men could deal with their partner having sex for a living. I can tell you now that they wouldnt.
I can understand that you dont like porn, a lot of women dont. I personally can take it or leave it, after all its not forced on me.
But you are insulting all the ladies on here that dont have a problem with it, which you obviously do.
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