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I'm confused by his behavior.

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Question - (20 July 2012) 5 Answers - (Newest, 22 July 2012)
A female age 30-35, anonymous writes:

Dear cupid

I met someone at a meeting and it seems that he liked me

he kept hugging me and staying near me all the time.So we kept contact after the meeting. He asked me out on a date and he coudlnt keep his hands off me at the cinema and kept hugging me the whole day.Now here is the problem. He has a best friend. a girl, and he had a crush on her but she rejected him now they are best friends. They do ALOT together because they live close etc. so eah he asked me out again and wants to go saturday. and the next day after with her. The thing is he flirts with me. acts like he likes me etc I didnt know what to do so i confronted him if he had a little feeling for me. He said he saw us as friends. So i was kinda upset because.. he acted all loveydovey.. So i canceld the date and told him I cant go out with someone who acts that way.. Since I canceld the date he acts weird and says stuff like"Oh i just had a great massage:3"" And i know its from his best friend.. I just dont know what he is trying to do. it makes me confused..

View related questions: best friend, crush, flirt

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A female reader, Annagram United States +, writes (22 July 2012):

Can I just say that men are scum? Okay, at least the guy that this chick is talking about. Block him, defriend him, show the guy that YOU are more important than his games he is playing.

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A female reader, mpumie South Africa +, writes (20 July 2012):

mpumie agony auntHe really has confused you. I'm thinking he was trying to make that other woman jealous by being next to you an acting all lovey dovey. If he was into you he would have kept he hands off you and be a little bit shy. Cause he can't be all that when you have just met. In my opinion he just being friendly and needed a company and not a relationship. Don't let it hurt you soon you will forget that he has ever crossed your mind. It does happen to every woman and only to find the guy just liked you as a friend. If he was proposing love to you, there was going to be lots of shyness something that will indicate love. Closeness and all that was just being friendly.

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A female reader, jinxx Canada +, writes (20 July 2012):

jinxx agony auntThis guy just doesn't seem to know what he wants!!

One day he's very physical with you, the other he's telling you he sees you as friends. You have a right to be confused, because this is confusing.

If I were you, I'd just forget about him altogether. When you meet someone who genuinely has feelings for you, they wont play games and they definitely wont just see you as a friend.

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A female reader, Aunty BimBim Australia +, writes (20 July 2012):

Aunty BimBim agony auntHe saw you as friends, you got upset and cancelled plans, he now posts stuff (presumably on facebook or other social network) about recieving massages, which you KNOW are from his friend.

There are any number of things he could be trying to do:

he might be one of those who update their status with every little thing that happens, and nothing is meant by it

or, he might be trying to show you that your cancelling on him didn't affect him when it may have

or, he might be an nasty pasty who knows you will be watching and wondering, and doing it to hurt you.

You seem to be looking for hidden meanings or messages, if its bothering you Block Him, problem solved!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (20 July 2012):

Hi,

If you know this guy is into his female friend, he may try to move on with you but still have feelings for her. The fact that he is seeing her as friends is not helping. From what you write the female seems to play on that and she may even enjoy having a guy who is running after her. My advice would be forget him and move on (to someone else). You don't have to put up with this.

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