A
male
age
41-50,
*rivennuts
writes: have been dating my girl friend and living with her for for 7 months at first she was really cool then out of no where she started getting jealous over everyone I talked to even my male friends its like she's not happy if i don't spend my every waking moment with her its to the point now where i can't have my two best friends up (they are a couple who i have known for years) she tries to say i'm making eyes at his wife its just unreal I thought w had a great relationship but I really have got to the point that i just want her out of my life,We had a cook out last weekend and i had the two friends i just talked about up and a friend that I have known for years a nieghbor she is a girl but just a friend and i had invited her because she was home by herself and she had just given us an air conditioner because of the terrible heat wave we've been having and it was my way of telling her thank you. well she turned it into a two day fight i can't talk to anyone any more or i'm hitting on them or trying to get away from her What the hell is wrong with this woman i thought i knew her and she is just a physco from hell she tells my friends that i'm meen to her and tells them all kinds of lies about me its like she is trying to drive a wedge from the whole outside world against me ,I have told her if she keeps up the B.S i'm hoing to ask her to move.Every time this happens she starts acting cool again until the next time we do some thing or go some where i can;t take it any more what should i do how do i get her to relise that I love her and i'm not trying to get anyone else?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 July 2012): Heyy don't just throw her out of your life like that. Maybe you could just have a talk with her and explain to her about not being so jealous about everything. She is jealous because she loves you and way too insecure. So maybe you should just talk to her because she would not do that if she loves you. If you also love her then what's the point of not getting back together. I think you should get back together and if she loves you truly then she will change for you.
A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (20 July 2012):
 I think you should ask her to leave.
I think Aunty BimBim is right on, but I think you already did the first steps of her advice. You *have* already talked to her about this over and over, and I think now is the time to back up what you already told her you'd do, which is leave her if she kept it up.
Her insecurity is causing her to try and control you. You did nothing wrong by inviting that girl over while she was with you and other friends were too. That was above board, especially if she's only a friend and isn't an ex or a former love interest.
You can't make up for your girlfriend's insecurity, and she's done nothing to change her behavior on her own. It's time to call it quits before you lose all of your friends because she's scared of someone else getting more attention from you than she is. She is TOXIC, and the time for words and ultimatums has now passed.
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (20 July 2012):
 Your name says it all. Now that the lastest episode is cooled down sit her down at the kitchen table for an honest talk.
Make sure she is listening.
Stay calm .... in you own words tell her if it happens again she is out. Ask her if she understands. Ask her if she feels she may need the help of a professional counsellor to help her develop strategies to make sure it doesn;t happen again. If she wants counselling help her Get it, give her support, but as soon as she goes psycho show her the door.
And stick to it! Because you have already spoken to her, and she goes all cool she thinks this is all she has to do without making any changes at all. If you tell her that she is out the door if she does it again but don;t follow through she will never change, your friends will gradually disappear and all you'll have in your life is a psycho bitch.
Good luck with it!
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