A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes: i have a son. hes only gone eighteen. he has a girlfriend. she has an apartment and a child who lives with her aunty. she has limitedtime with her four year old. shes six years olderthan my son. he stays over without telling me andturned off his phone . just to avoid an arguement i let him stay over last week thinking it will blow oversoon. but hes staying now all the time and we are fighting?i dont know what to do? help?x
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 August 2011): thanks to everyone.... And to the first person who wrote
im just trying to look after my son who does hash and weed.
im trying to help him stop with it and i do worry because she
supplies him with drugs so dont tell me to get a grip. thanks
to all its been really helpful x but not the first one. .
A
female
reader, Vanessa_Twinkle +, writes (19 August 2011):
You should let him commit his own mistakes, you can give him your opinion but thats it, he´s 18 and he´ll do what he wants, he might even do it more just to prove his point,if anything goes wrong he´ll know you were right and he´ll apologize. Good luck
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A
female
reader, Aunty Susie +, writes (19 August 2011):
At his age, I don't think that there's much you can do, accept be there for him. You could try talking to him, pointing out the obvious. But boys that age, don't hang around much listening to their mums do they! Hopefully it will run a short course, and he will come out of it unscathed. Best of luck.
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A
female
reader, Mariab +, writes (19 August 2011):
I think that as much as it will hurt you at this moment... you have to let him go. You cannot choose a partner for your son and technically - he is an adult (even though I think 18 is still too young)!! If you fight with him, you will force him to choose between her and you. You have to accept the situation so that he can feel free to let you into their lives. Its not easy and I feel for you but I think that to fight him now will only make your situation worse. And who knows.... after assuming fatherhood to a 4 year old, he may realize that he's bitten off more than he can chew. Let him learn his way... Good luck xx
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 August 2011): Fot a start your son is 18 years old....he does not have to ask your permission to stay at his girlfriends, he is no longer a child!!
'I let him stay over last week'.....get a grip, he can do as he pleases.
However I would be asking questions has to why this woman doesn't have her child with her but at her aunties instead, that one is a strange one andyou would be right to be worried about that has something has obviously happened that as caused that but get your facts first.
Your son is an adult though and does not have to tell you what he is doing all the time, he is grown up and let him go!!!
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