A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:I've just divorced my husband of 20 years then met this man 16 years older than me. Im attracted to him because he's more caring and understanding than my ex-husband. He has no kids and has his own home and car and still working with a good income. He is helpful. I meant when things break down in my house he will come round and fix it for me. But he doesnt like to spend money even if it needed. I've been with him almost two years now. When I want to eat out shopping or travelling I just go with my friends. With him we mainly shop for food or watch television at home. I find it bore and frustrated and dont know what to do. Please advise.
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (31 October 2011):
 IF you are bored now and unhappy it will only get worse.
I suggest that you build a nice life with your friends and end this boring dull relationship so you can leave yourself open to new ones should the happen.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (31 October 2011): If your bored and frustrated then finish it gently and look elsewhere.He probably likes the companionship and sees you as an independant woman who wants a bit of company also.
Your clearly not ready for this, you still want spoiling and fun, not pipe and slippers.
Go date around, have a laugh, find a likeminded boyfriend.
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A
male
reader, eddie85 +, writes (31 October 2011):
 I am going to agree with Mystiquek on this one. If this guy is in his mid to early 60's he's probably pretty set in his ways and perhaps lives on a fixed income. Does he have extra money and just prefers not to spend it or is money tight?
Some men, as they age, forget the element of romance, and that often times means having the money to find entertainment. If you haven't already expressed your discontent, you should. Explain to him that you want to go out and do something and that you don't feel like watching TV and simply shopping for food.
Sadly, money issues and differences of opinion on how to spend it are often times the source of a lot of relationship discontent. Through some open communication with him and the fact that you need to "live" a little might get him to open his pocket book a little. Don't forget too, that you have an obligation to help offset some of the expenses as well.
Good luck.
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A
female
reader, mystiquek +, writes (31 October 2011):
 If you're bored and frustrated then perhaps its time to look elsewhere. If you're almost 50 and he's 16 years older then he's about 65 right? So he's probably happy and content just doing the little things. You have to decide if you're happy enough to accept the way things are, or move on. I doubt if this man will change.
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A
female
reader, PerhapsNot +, writes (31 October 2011):
 You're mismatched. It is extremely difficult (even impossible) for a person, who is not cheap, to be happy in a relationship with someone who is. I only know of one happy, cheap couple. And the only reason they're content is rooted in the fact that they're both cheap and value frugal living.
You were strong enough to divorce your husband of 20 years, so how difficult will it be to end this frustrating 2 year relationship? You probably should have left him earlier as cheapness is a very obvious trait. There is no need for you to be unhappy. You should be able to go out to eat and travel with your SO.
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A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (31 October 2011):
 You have to choose whether you want to stay with Good but Cheap.
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