A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Ok, so I've asked a couple people I know about this, but I want to get an outside opinion. I'm an in-the-closet gay guy, and I really like this guy I work with. Sometimes I think that he might like me back, but I feel like its just me seeing what I want to see. Like when he winks at me sometimes, or tells me that he likes my smile, and I think that he's flirting with me. But as soon as I think that, I hear about him doing the same thing to other people (both guys and girls). I'm not an idiot, and I know that the chances are slim to none that he's feeling for me what I feel for him; I just don't know how to deal with it, I've had feelings for a straight guy before (except I was 100% he was straight) and it ended terribly. I've thought about just getting it off my chest and telling him, but word gets around fast at my job and I don't really want to be the center off gossip. I'm really at a loss, and I don't see this ending well whatever decision I make...
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male
reader, AvgGuy1 +, writes (19 October 2010):
 Blonde30s nailed it. He's probably Bi or gay. Only you can tell, by observation, whether he's 'workin' it or being a 'player'.
If anything, ask him if he wants to get lunch some time. You can then get to know him over lunch(es). Then you can decide whether you want to pursue it further.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (15 October 2010): Without going into the issues of a work place romance I would say you have to be 100% certain he rolls that way before you go too far. But... speaking as a straight male... I have never winked at another guy and told them they have a great smile (nor have I ever been tempted to) and I don't know any of my straight male friends that have done that... soooo... it seems you might be on the right track. Good luck.
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A
male
reader, Cerberus_Raphael  +, writes (15 October 2010):
 He winks at you and tells you that you have a nice smile? I don't often hear of other straight men winking at other straight men and then telling them they like their smile. I think it is safe to tell him. Just consider one other problem, are you sure it is a good idea to date someone you work with?
I hope that helps.
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