A
female
age
30-35,
*carredkitty
writes:Hi, I have a question about my relationship with my boyfriend. I am 19 almost 20 and he's 21, I'm a virgin and he's not. We have been dating for two months now, and I have told him that I'm still a virgin and that he's not allowed to touch certain areas. I don't know if he's trying to convince me to sleep with him or to let him touch one of the restricted areas.I'm really nervous and such, but then we start playing around and he tries to turn me on and I get fuzzy in the mind slightly and play along and try to turn him on and I start to want it, but I really want to wait until I'm married. I've told him my concerns and my standards I'm set on keeping to, and he's promised that he'll help me keep it that way. But just recently, he's getting pretty, well I wouldn't say insistant, but close to begging I guess, to let him in on one of my restrictions: let him see, touch, and etc. my breasts....I'm really confused and nervous about this entire thing, I really like him but I really want to wait until I'm married before anything like sex comes up. As the saying goes, first is the kiss, then make-out, then kisses on the neck and soon it's all the way. Please help me.
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female
reader, scarredkitty +, writes (26 July 2009):
scarredkitty is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thank you guys for everything you've told me. My bf and I are slowing down our relationship. I'll keep all of your opinions in mind for future references lol. Again, thanks guys.
A
female
reader, littlest.devil +, writes (23 July 2009):
 you are not obligated to do anything to him. if u don't want him to touch a part of u and then he goes and touches another part of u that u dont want touched then that is very very disrespectful. he knows u wanted to wait yet hes still doing this? im sorry but that is very wrong. if u dont want to do anything then dont do anything to him or hes going to think u want to do something and hell try to go further. i know ur scared of being alone but would u rather be alone and eventually find a good guy who respects ur feelings or do u want to be with him and get pressured into doing something u dont want to do?? please talk to him about it.
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A
male
reader, yorkie po-oh  +, writes (22 July 2009):
 hes gonna get less attracted to you the longer you dont let him u mite think this is the guy dont let him get away with too much ur doin a good job but at least somethin like seein them just to keep him wantin more an he should know where u stand on this and respect it if he dont then hes not rite for u an u could find a better guy good luck
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A
female
reader, scarredkitty +, writes (22 July 2009):
scarredkitty is verified as being by the original poster of the questionOk, I know I haven't said much about myself in the question and in the thanks I had for you guys. I'm LDS or mormon for those who don't know what LDS means. I've been raised to wait until marriage and never allow anyone to touch me in any way that is improper for before marriage situations. Oral, I'm too embarrassed to even think about it. Hand relief is a possiblity, but to just go ahead and have sex with all the foreplay and such, even if he is my bf and not some stranger. Does it really have to come to that?
I want to wait, but I'm also afraid that if I wait, he won't stick around and i'm afraid of being alone. Alot in my life has happened to get me this way. I hope this clears up a bit of your questions. I still would like your honest opinion, even tho i'm lds. Thanks for your advice.
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A
female
reader, scarredkitty +, writes (22 July 2009):
scarredkitty is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you so much guys. I really appriciate your opinions and answers. It does help me alot to know these things since i'm not very experienced with men in general and I guess that it really doesn't help if we turn each other on, but everytime he goes to try to turn me on and I pull away, he does it in a different spot. So I do what's fair and do the same to him.... which doesn't help I know...
How can I get him to calm down and just appricate that we are making out and kissing and help him feel that he doesn't need more than that unless we decide together that we can go further?
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A
male
reader, Jason32477  +, writes (22 July 2009):
 I`ve never been in a wait till marriage relationship,so don`t know if I can give good advice here.I respect your decision and feel the world would be a better place if more people were like you.If I was with a girl that insisted on waiting I would be just like your bf.Continually trying to push for but not forcing more.Turning him on or letting him turn you on is not helping your situation.Everything is give and take so don`t be doing things to him he can`t do to you.Just be strong in your convictions.Other than that I don`t really know what to tell you.Sorry.I don`t feel this is much help but its all I got to offer.
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A
female
reader, littlest.devil +, writes (22 July 2009):
stick to your guns. if u do not want him to sleep with you or touch on of ur areas then thats that. tell him that u feel very strongly about waiting until marriage and even if he doesn't think he's begging it seems like it and that its rlly upseting u. if he respects ur feelings then he'll hear u out. good luck to you, i hope everything turns out for the best.
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