A
female
age
26-29,
*isasterpiece-Ox
writes: I'm 15 and still a virgin. All of my friends have had sex, i think im ready to but i really don't know what to do. i m not sure whether to wait for the right person or just go ahead and do it. if i don't wait for the right person will i regret it afterwards ?? somebody please help me
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female
reader, DaringDaphne +, writes (17 December 2010):
Uh...yes! I feel kind of pathetic, since I'm 15 and have never been kissed. I'm not ugly, but it's just the way it is. So, I think you should definitely wait. You can't lose it to a high school crush. Sex is banalized in today's society, but it souldn't be. You should seriously think aout it.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 April 2010): Yes you will regret it. Everyone i know whos had sex, and they arent with that man anymore, regret it.
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A
male
reader, Red Green 0289 +, writes (26 April 2010):
Yes, you will.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 April 2010): Yes you should at leat let the first time be an experience of love. The first time you WILL remember.
Having said that, the longer you wait the harder it is going to get to actually find someone special. I know this from personal experience.
Being a virgin myself, I find it very hard to relate to anyone of the opposite sex at my age (26) because the expectation is that I will have had the experience by now. And they are well within their rights to expect it.
But it is not a source of pride to me. I regret many missed opportunities to have let go of that part of me. But I didn't out of fear.
So yes, ensure that your first isn't some drunken shenanigan. But don't wait forever. Beign 26 and never having had anyone pay you the slightest bit of attention is extremely lonely and depressing.
Flynn 24
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 April 2010): Yes, you most likely will regret it. You want your first time to be with someone who wants all of you, not just your body, and understands the fact that you are giving him something you can never give anyone else. Trust me, it's far more special that way.
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A
female
reader, Jesc +, writes (26 April 2010):
To this day I regret it.
I wish I saved myself for someone who loved me.
For women, It's a gift to give away. You want it to be with someone you love and who will cherish it. Not just leave you after. It's a gift you can never give away after that.
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A
female
reader, laura12 +, writes (26 April 2010):
the first person you loose your virginity to will be someone you will never evr forget. so please dont have a jerk take your virginity away. your only 15 why start so early?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 April 2010): I felt exactly the same as you. I waited for the right one but then by the age of 18 just gave up and did it. I am 30 this year and still think of that as the biggest mistake of my life. I wish I had waited for someone who I actually cared for. You only get to do it once, so make it count.
P.S. I know everyone will say this and it's probably meaningless to you right now, but if all your friends say they've done it at 15 they're either lying (really they are) or they're breaking the law in most parts of the world (it's still illegal if both of you are underage).
P.P.S. If you do do it, wear a condom for the love of God. What's worse, being a virgin at 15, or being a father at 16?
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A
female
reader, Polaroid93 +, writes (25 April 2010):
Your still young, you may feel like the odd one out now but when you can look back in pride and your friends can't you'll be alot happier
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A
female
reader, Keira9312 +, writes (25 April 2010):
YES!! by all means wait for the right person. You need to know eachother for a long time before you can start anything. If you dont get to know him, then he may leave you after you become pregnant. Besides, you have a life ahead of you, and you will be much more successful if you finish highschool. Your child will have much better life.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (25 April 2010): i am a virgin at 30, i am still looking for the right person, re your question you are doing the right thing thing wait, if you had sex and the relationship don't work out you can not go back and you will regret in not waiting
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A
female
reader, CindyCares +, writes (25 April 2010):
You surely will rregret it. The first time is a delicate moment from many points of you- you need to share it with someone who loves you, or at least like you enough, to make the effort of being sensitive to your physical neeeds and attentive to your emotions. Please don't throw it away with the first Tom,Dick or Harry you bump into.
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A
male
reader, Problem.helper +, writes (25 April 2010):
It's your decision but if i was you i would wait for someone who i love and he loves you. He doesn't have to be special just you need to love each other.I think that's the sex you should have the first time.Later in life you can find sexual partners just for sex but the first time is very important
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A
female
reader, It's all be okay +, writes (25 April 2010):
Dear Disasterpiece-OxYou need to change your friends, honey. If they really have all had sex already, then they are the wrong friends to be hanging out with. Firstly, you are underage. I know that sounds old fashioned, but the law is there for a reason - it's to protect you, because we think that a child of 15 is too young to have sex. Trying sex is not like trying a new flavour of Ben and Jerry's. It's about open, honest, and caring communication with your body with someone you love. You don't have someone special that you love. Do you want to have open, honest, caring communication with your body with any old chap that you come across? You'll feel used and empty, trust me. Just wait. You have years ahead of you and many many years in which to have sex. Find a nice boyfriend, go out with him for some time until you feel really comfortable with him and in love, and then think about having sex.
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (25 April 2010):
If you lose it to some scabby little boy then you will always regret it.
Plus, if you just let some boy have you then is he going to put effort in and get you to enjoy it? Nope you are going to get 3 awkward pumps and a grunt. Do you want to remember that forever? I wouldn't.
Let a boy get to love you and learn how to please you sexually, and then you'll have a really good memory.
Good Luck!! xx
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