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anonymous
writes: I am only 12 and i am pregnant.Me and my boyfreind wo is 13 nearly 14 used protection but it split.Only me and him no but i need to no what to do.PLEASE HELP!(i have gone a few weeks) Reply to this Question
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female
reader, eyeswideopen  +, writes (19 March 2008):
 Looking at dates is a good thing.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 March 2008): well first off dont worry. I am 14 yrs old and im a mother of a one yr old baby boy. its great being a mother, but you need to be responsible. well i shouldnt b talkin about it yet bcus ur not sure if u actually r pregnant yet. try a pregnancy test, but they rnt always right, you could ask ur doctor but youd hav to tell ur parents first. if u dont want to worry ur parents wen ur not even sure its tru, then wait a few weeks and c if any signs of pregnancy r happening. r u hungrier than usual, hav u missed more than one period? these r questions u need to start askin urself. u may feel tired or restless if u r actually pregnant, so all u hav to do is wait and c. if these signs r happenin, u should probably tell ur parents even tho u think they might kick u out, bcus u cant keep this to urself its a serious thing that they need to no. if u r pregnant dont listen to pple who say "ur a slut" or "ur to young get an abortion" chances r they r probly jelous. u should go with wat ur heart tells u and if u think u want this baby and ur ready for it, i say hav it! =D as long as ur happy with ur decision and u no that u will be happy with ur life by bringing a baby into this world, then im happy for u too!!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 March 2008): wow! I'm 12 too. I'm in 8th grade. I'm not pregnant but I don't judge. If your parents don't know, then tell someone you can really trust, but be careful of your friend because people do change. I hpoe you will be okay.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 February 2008): hi i was pregnant at 16 and its the hardest thing you can do. i am now 24 and have a 7 year and a 4 year. i cant go out as no one to watch the kids you cant work as you would only pay for the child care. So it does make u feel lonely. if i was you i would talk to your mum and dad and maybe get rid as u only 12 you have your hold life ahead of u live it before you have kids. i know its going to be hard on you no matter which way you go but remember there is help out there.from SAM
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 February 2008): i personly think that you should keep it because when i was 13 i had a baby and now i am 17 i am so happy i kept it now i have 3 children aged 4 2 and 1
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 January 2008): I'm sorry to hear about your situation, but you have to think about this in a logical way. Do you really think its a good idea to go through this pregnancy when your still only a a bay yourself. Ok im nobody to talk. Im 15 and 6 months pregnant, but i love it, and my friends and family have accpeted that i wanted this baby, and i am going to try my damned hardest to give it the best life i can. My boyfriend has stuck by me all the way. which is great.
Its greaat that you thought about the odds and used contraceptionm, but unfourtunatly the spliting of a condom can happen.
My advice tell your parents as quickly as possible, and then you can discuss the options you and your boyfriends want to take. You either keep your baby, or you get rid of it. But makes sure its yours and your bfs decision.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2008): Hello people thank you all so so much for all your replies and all of your replies helped me alot.I am now 13 years old in full time education and me and my little gurl Ellie Louise are doing fine.I took the advise and told my mother and farther straight away.they didnt go mad and took me straight to the docs were i made the desicion to keep my daughter.Me and my boyfreind are happily still together and he is due to move in with us wen he turns 15.i felt i needed to update everyone on how we wre doing and what happened thank you so much
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 December 2007): im sorry about that but u need to tell your parants thats the only way to go theyll be mad but theyll help
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 December 2007): honey lose the baby and TELL UR parents(do that 1st)
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 September 2007): I think she already realizes she is too young for sex! Keep throwing that at her, and she'll continue whether or not she is really pregnant! But YES- I agree to see a Doc or a planned parenthood for a test to be sure. I have 4 children, and the first three Home tests were NEG, and I was between 6 and 12 weeks along! They are not accurate. My 4th child, and home test was pos, at 9 weeks.
Talk to your parents!! No they will not be happy, but they will eventually get over it and be there for you. Its costly,timely, and alot of work having a baby. Not ALL fun and games like most teens believe.Its a rough decision, and a rough life ahead if you really are, and the decisions you make are a lifetime ....be wise-- truely think things through, and do not forget- you did not make this situation alone! Include the boy and his family in your conversations! Good Luck Dear.....
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female
reader, Pork Hock  +, writes (26 April 2007):
Listen to all the other posts this poor girl is terrified. stop criticising her for having under-aged sex...ok she broke the law, but don't we all, illegally parking, jay-walking. This is obviously more serious than getting a parking ticket. To you, you know you are too young to have sex. Childhood and teenage years are with you for such a short time, you spend the majority of your life being an adult and you shouldn't have to be facing this. Make sure you know you are definitely pregnant, but you have a choice, whether it is having the baby, abortion or adoption. You have the choice.But you don't have to do this alone. The facts are if you are pregnant you need to tell your parents or guardians. You need counselling whatever decision you make and you need lots of support. Get some help tomorrow, today and just make sure you are pregnant. Go and see your GP.
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female
reader, NJmomabear +, writes (26 April 2007):
 Ok, coming from someone who was pregnant at your age, here is what you need to think about. Like it or not, you need to tell your parents. They will have to support you and this baby, not you. There is really no happy ending to this story any way you go because you are still developing yourself. If you choose to give up for adoption, to try to carry a baby to full term would rob you of the nutrition you need to develop and be able to support yourself in the future, nevermind a baby. You may not be able to handle carrying a baby to full term then giving it up. That can lead to being a spring board for future mistakes since your actions will be controlled by guilt. It may lead to mental illness. Abortion will have long term emotional damage at your age too. You will probably need counceling for many years after this. Above all, remember this is YOUR LIFE!
Please for your own sake, try to be more careful!
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female
reader, 13 and pregnat +, writes (25 January 2007):
i know how you feel i got pregnat at the age of 13 and my advice is tell an adult that you trust and do what you think is right.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 December 2006): I was in the same issue it happen to me i am 16 with 2 kids one is 3 and one is 5 months, i didn't tell my mom until i started getting bigger until it was noticeable she did not tell my dad until a while after they supported my decision of keeping the baby all the way, well anyways it was my decision to keep it and if u decide to make sure you are the one responsible not your parents or family.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 December 2006): Well I have the same problem this might or might not help. I found it helps me if I know for sure that my boyfriend loves me and he will help me with this. I have found some suport groups in my local area. There are people out there with the same problem. If you don't tell your mom first your dad is bound to find out. I would confind in my mom and she could tell your dad while you are at a friends. I hope this helps!!! Remeber I will love you! lol
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 May 2006): My God, how can the last person that posted tell a 12 year old girl that abortion isnt the answer??!!
She's only 12 for heavens sake, what a stupid thing to post.
Of course it's not the answer, but its certainly an option.
you're only young sweetheart, & I know it's probably the last thing you want to do but you must tell your parent, they will eventually find out. If thats not an option for you then absolutely definately visiting the doctor is.
Good luck xxx
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 May 2006): what ever you do, dont get an abortion! look up pictures and information on an abortion and you'll see how wrong it is! its a baby, "your baby!" i know you're young, but abortion isnt the solution to this problem. its unhealthy physically and mentally! if you do this, it will haunt you for the rest of your life! you're obviously not ready for a baby, but if you have your family, your mother, or even the boy and the boys family to help you, you're not alone and you could raise the baby and be happy! if not, I would give the baby up for adoption to a family who will love and care for the baby. do tell you mom. she needs to know about this. oh and yes it does need to be your mom and not some other adult. your mom is always going to be there for you and nobody else is. noone truly loves or cares about you like you mom does. so please tell your mom and good luck, i hope this works out fine.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 May 2006): I Can't Belive how judgemental all of you are being! yeah she is 12 and probaly should not have done this, but right now she need someone to be there for her not tell her how wrong she was. i'm sure now she know it was wrong. I just want to let you know that like everyone else said i hope you told someone and can get this figured out! having a baby is a big responsability! I know it seems hard now, But It has already happened and its what you do about it that matters now. it will be hard no matter what you decide, but everything happens for a reason, and you will learn from this experiance. good luck to you and keep your head up!
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female
reader, Phoebe Halliwell  +, writes (13 April 2006):
 Right ok, deep breaths, calm down!!!!
first of all, you have to tell an adult you trust.
Second of all, you really shouldn't have been sleeping with anyone as you're not 16 yet.
Third, your parents may explode but they have the right to. To them you're porabably still their little gril. How does your boyfriend feel about this? Is he gonna stand by you?
My top advice, tell someone. Before they find out another way
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 April 2006): condoms are realy not that safe all the time
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 April 2006): Tell someone you trust, (it dosn't need to be a parent) and talk it out. Only you know what the right decision is.good luck.
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female
reader, XalieX +, writes (2 April 2006):
Firstly you need to do a test to make sure that you are acctually pregnant. And secondly at 12 you are too young to be having sex, it's not something you should be doing to bragg about with you'r friends it's to be done when you are in love, the legal age for sex is 16 you must remember that. I would suggest that you spoke to an adult you were close to be it a relative, teacher or neighbour. At the end of the day it will be you'r decision wether you keep the baby or not, and whatever you decide there will always be people there for you, only you know what you want. GOOD LUCK
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reader, robinlovescena +, writes (2 April 2006):
 ok, i just got done having the class, sex ed, and i am really disopointed at what i am hearing. how could you even think of having sex. well tell ur mom. i know it is hard, but you have to do it. take a test. make sure that it is for sure. make sure that you are not just coming to conclusions. tell the guy you had slept with. he must know. i have never been in ur situation, so its hard for me to go into details on what you should do, but good luck. you made a mistake, and im not going to lecture yo
robin
aka advice gurl
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female
reader, smeedle +, writes (1 April 2006):
 First thing is to do a test, you can get these from the chemist or go to Brook Advisory if you live in the UK.
Brook will give you confidential advice and will be able to advise on future contraception.
I have to say that I do think you are far too young for sex but you have done it and that is that, no point in me lecturing you.
You do need to see someone about this as even if you are not pregnant and there is a good chance that it is just the worry that has stopped your period, you will need to be given sex advice, having sex is risky for someone so young.
when you are young your periods can be irregular so get a test, your chemist has them, supermarkets have them, GP will do them, but doing a test is the main thing for now.
If you are pregnant then Brook or one of the young peoples advice lines will help and advise you.
Do not leave this any longer please.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 April 2006): Hi there, i was only young when i had my first child i reckon best thing to do is calm down have have really good think about it with your partner.Then yip the big step to telling your parents. An it isnt easy but they will soon come around to the idea. GOOD LUCK
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male
reader, tux +, writes (1 April 2006):
 I believe you are right now jumping to conclusions. It sounds like you had sex and the condom broke and you are under the impression that that'll lead to a baby.. It can, but you need to see a doctor so you can get tested for pregnancy and std's as well. Just to be on the safe side.
I do hope for you that you are only thinking you are pregnant. You have a long way ahead of you in life. Re-evaluate your practices. You problaly should hold off on sex for a few more years..
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female
reader, xXxBabymamaXxX +, writes (1 April 2006):
 Underage sex is a big probleme, sex education is not given in enough detail. By having sex you broke the law, underage sex. 12 is young but this happens the whole time. Stop, think and reflect on what you have done, you have created another person at an age where you are not phyically or mentally ready, there is nothing you can do now, the baby is in there and you need to tell someone older, if you can't tell your parents, tell your aunt or someone older who would be able to help... abortion is a lot of money, but at 12 you should be out having fun and not pushing a pram... If you do ever have sex again be mature and talk to someone so you know what diseases you can get, and discuss all kinds of protection, good luck though, laura 16, irish
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 April 2006): You need to talk to an adult that you can trust- and get them to take you to the Doctors to get you checked over and determine if you are pregnant and then what stage the pregnancy is at. You may have had an accident with the contraception and missed your period that does not mean you are pregnant, the stress of the condom splitting or stress of any kind can affect your menstrual cycle. If you are pregnant then you have a really tough decision to make, whether or not you decide to keep the baby is up to you do not let anyone else make that decision for you although I would say that having a child at any age is not easy and really whether you can keep your baby depends on whether you have a good support structure in place either family/foster family that would help you to raise your baby. If not then an abortion is not the only answer you could have the baby adopted. Also I work with a girl who had a baby when she was 13 and whilst she says she would obviously have had her daughter later if she could have now that she has her she wouldn't change a thing. Sometimes its so weird though shes only 20 and has the responsibility of a 7 year old child. Good Luck its a tough decision God bless you.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 April 2006): Find your local Planned Parenthood and make an appointment immediately. They will go over all the options with you so you can make the best choice for yourself. They have a sliding scale so you won't have to worry about it being too expensive. Consider all aspects of this seriously. You have your whole life ahead of you, and this choice will impact everything else to come.
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female
reader, Angelicc +, writes (1 April 2006):
 i meant mother not more
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female
reader, Angelicc +, writes (1 April 2006):
Okay if you had sex within the last 72 hour, grab your boyfriend, grab some money and run down to the nearest drug store and get the morning after pill. If not then you need to speak to an adult, possibly be your mother to discuss your options. You can either go with your more or with your boyfriend to the nearest family planning clinic and get a pregnancy test. Even if you do get the morning after pill or test negative you should still speak to your mother as in your entering into a sexual relationship at such a young age then she should know.
Really at 12 you really shouldnt be entering into a sexual you relationship. The reason they set the legal age at 16 is to protect you, as you’re not nearly mature enough to handle the consequences. You not only face pregnancy but also the risk of STI’s, STD’s or even HIV.
Have a serious talk to your mother or another adult about your sexual relationship; you need to know the risk and how to take care of yourself.
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female
reader, bodylotion +, writes (31 March 2006):
 YOU ARE FAR FAR FAR TO YOUNG TO BE HAVING A BABY.I AM GLAD TO HEAR YOU USED SOMETHING BUT THEY ARN'T 100 PERCENT.I HAVE TO AGREE WITH ASK PHOEBE IT WILL AFFECT YOUR LIFE IF YOU KEEP IT.AND PLEASE LET YOUR PARENTS KNOW HAS THEY WILL BE DEVISTIATED IF THEY FIND OUT YOU DIDN'T TELL THEM.GOOD LUCK WITH YOUR CHOICE.
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reader, ask phoebe +, writes (31 March 2006):
 At 12 you are very young to be pregnant. Firstly, you need to tell an adult you trust and decide whether or not you want to keep the baby. I strongly advise you not to as it will affect your life a lot, I myself have a baby sister and she is a LOT of hard work. Whatever you decide to do, Good luck.
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