A
female
age
36-40,
*ngelicbeauty
writes: Dear Cupid,My boyfriend and I are considering getting married. Actually, from the beginning of our relationship, our intention is to see if we were a match. Over the year, we have communicated almost every day and are completely in love. The problem is that he is on the other side of the world. It is hard to be so far away from him but at the same time, we have taken it to our advantage and learned so much about each other. I want to marry him but I am scared about moving away from family, friends and all that i am familiar with. But, I mean, he lives on the other side of the world. He already is established at work and I am almost done universitiy. We are not in a rush as to when to get married. But, this is the path that we are on. Do you think it's wrong for me to move away? I love the country that he is in. It is quite beautiful but I am scared that I might be making an immature decision. What do you think?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, asian tealeaf +, writes (27 October 2008):
i dont know about u, dear, but if im feeling 100% and the guys on the same page, id get up and go. as a matter of fact, i was engaged to a thailandi guy i met in israel i was living there for 2 and a half yrs and he was a foreign worker there, he did not speak english nor i thai.so i learnt hebrew in 3 months and fluently spoke to him this way as he learnt hebrew while he was there.anyhow, my mom, born and raised in vietnam inteervened later on when i returned to canada saying she did not approve of me moving to thailand to live in some stick hut on a rice paddy.point is, i was prepared to do so. but i later found him very needy over the long distance and eventually broke it off myself. but i did love him immensely. and i know, he was very very ,miuch attached to nme as well. he cried when i told why i could not come. thais are very emotional and the men will cry without shame. if u love him, go. u will always question what if, if u dont. and regret is the hardest thing to live with. if things dont work u can always return home. and at least u know u put ur half in.
A
male
reader, Danielepew +, writes (27 October 2008):
Many people leave their home countries when they marry someone from abroad. Sometimes they love the new country, sometimes they don't, but manage, and sometimes they just hate the place and ask to go back. I even know about a person who was so disappointed with the place she went to live that she just demanded to go back. I need to say that the difference between her home town and her new abode was enormous.
There is no way to know whether this is a good idea. You would have to marry him to know.
But, I guess that the first question should be whether it's a great idea to marry him. Then proceed to other questions.
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