A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:So my best friend is male and I'm female. We used to hate eachother when we were younger. And with recent events we have become best friends in the entire world. I tell him everything and visa versa. And let me say this. He is the type of guy that if he wants a girl he isn't shy at all and will go after it. Recently I realized I have feelings for him. and sometimes I think he does to. He kisses me on the cheek and forehead all the time. we hold hands sometimes and we hang out constantly and we flirt with eachother a lot. So when that happens part of me fills with hope then the other part reminds me that if he wanted me he would just go after it. I want to tell him I have feelings for him. but I don't want it to ruin our friendship because he's a VERY big reason why I'm still alive. Should I not tell him and get over it? or should I tell him and risk our friendship? Or should I let him make the first move. I don't know what to do.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Sorcerer +, writes (19 July 2010):
Just to respond to Cindy - as a male with a lot of female friends and a female best friend, I can tell you now that a man is just as scared about ruining a best friendship by making a move as a woman is.
A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (19 July 2010):
 i'd let him make the first move ,since you know he is a self -confident-, go-getting kind of guy.
You may think that he has not made his move yet in fear of ruining your friendship but I have this theory that this is a mainly female concern. If a man wants you- he wants you, and he won't give a rat's ass about maybe spoiling the friendship.
So - maybe he is getting there and will make is move reasonably soon,- but if he does not,then he was not that much into you and you are misreading his signals.
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