A
female
age
36-40,
*utterfly18
writes:It's a really long story, but I'm going to make it short. So, I have had a crush on a guy for almost a year and half, and we're both in college. Well I started to like him when I realized he liked me, but I'm just too shy to talk to him. He tried so many times to talk to me and show me that he liked me. Two months ago, he sat next to me in class(it wasn't by accident), so I felt so nervous and I was blushing and couldn't say a word. We both were so uncomfortable (even though I always dreamed of this moment, but I don't know, I just felt scared and I thought I was going to make a fool of myself if he talked to me). And to make it worse, I just sat somewhere else when the lecture was over, and now he's avoiding me.I really feel so bad about it because if I were him, I think I would be really hurt and especially since he doesn't really talk to lot of girls ...so im sure it took him alot of courage to do it, then I acted like that.I never meant to hurt him, but I'm just really shy and I felt so nervous and I just want to make it up to him (like apologize or something) because he's really a nice guy and doesnt deserve that...and I really like him, and I don't know, I just feel really nervous when I see him passing by and I feel like I can barely breathe and I really wish he knew how I feel about him...So GUYS would he let me down if I went and talked to him because he's hurt maybe? And is he shy like me, and that's why he never talked to me?Pleaaaaaaase help me with this .........I appreciate any advice.
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female
reader, FloridaCatGirl  +, writes (3 February 2011):
 If you sit and wait for him to make a move, you will miss your opportunity to get to know him. Find the strenth to sit next to him in class and talk to him! You already know that this guy is interested. Go sit next to him and strike up a conversation. Here's an example of something you can say:
YOU: So, how do you like the class so far?
Let him respond.
YOU: I'm Jane, by the way.
He will likely tell you his name at this point.
YOU: I apologize if I offended you a couple months ago, when you came and sat next to me. I'm just shy around new people.
Give him a chance to respond.
YOU: Anyhow, I was wondering if you'd like to get together and study sometime?
If he says yes... then YOU should say: Why don't we exchange phone numbers or email addresses.
If he says no... then YOU should say: Okay, well here is my phone number and email address in case you change your mind. (Write your name, phone number, and email on a piece of paper and hand it to him.) You could even add a little note to it that says, "Hope to hear from you. :)"
How does that sound? Do you think you can do this? Don't waste this opportunity. Life is too short... sometimes you need to take some chances!
A
male
reader, dirtball +, writes (3 February 2011):
 http://www.dearcupid.org/question/did-i-hurt-him.html
http://www.dearcupid.org/question/is-it-normal-to-feel-this-nervous-around.html
http://www.dearcupid.org/question/is-it-too-late-to-talk-to-my.html
http://www.dearcupid.org/question/i-dont-want-him-to-think-i-hate.html
Not to be a dick, but how much advice do you need before you take some action? I quit looking, but I'm willing to bet there are more posts here from you about this guy. I know I've posted an answer to you before.
"So GUYS would he let me down if I went and talked to him because he's hurt maybe?"
Impossible for us to know. You SHOULD go apologize to him or give it up. You've been worrying over this for MONTHS now. That's not healthy. It's becoming an obsession. DO something about it.
"And is he shy like me, and that's why he never talked to me?"
He does sound shy. How would you feel if you had finally gotten up enough nerve to sit next to him and he moved away? That's what he's feeling.
He attempted to make his move. Your body language shot him down. He WILL NOT make another attempt after failing. Especially because he's shy. If you EVER want something to happen with him, you're going to have to make the move.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (3 February 2011): Just summon up the courage to talk to him and let it all out. Don't worry about how awkward it is going to be. If talking to him is not something that you are bold enough to do, just email him or send him a message - Do something to let him know that you like him and are just nervous.
Emailing or messaging is not the ideal way to do it but something is better than nothing. Since both of you are shy, I think email will be a good way to express interest and then begin talking slowly.
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