A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:So I was just looking for some opinions on this one: This year, I developed a tiny bit of a crush on a teacher, I realize this is nothing to act on right now, but I'm not the type that gets a crush that often, I'm 15 and this is only my second crush. Anyway, what I'm trying to get at is- I don't think this is just a silly crush, but at the same time I do?And I have wanted to be a teacher since I was little, I want to teach at my high school. Would it be wrong to date him if I worked at the school? Even if I didn't work at the school, would it be wrong? Thanks for any answers :) xoxo
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female
reader, Drat001  +, writes (31 December 2010):
I hope you're still around to read this:
The most important thing to remember is that even if the school has no policy forbiding teacher-teacher relationships, it is absolutely important that you do not let your students know about it. It's OK to be married to another teacher at the school. It sometimes works to an advantage. But, dating is different. It's not really taboo, but it can cause lots of problems if the students find out. So, if you do date another teacher, don't ever discuss it with students, don't discuss it in front of students, don't even say that you're dating anyone at all. Keep your personal life completely seperate from and unknown to your students. Think, your favorite teachers, those who weren't married, did you know if they were dating, and if they were married, did you know about their husbands/wives?
A
female
reader, swordandredrose +, writes (26 May 2010):
I think you will be over your teacher by then. You are gonna meet so many new people.
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A
female
reader, k_c100 +, writes (26 May 2010):
 Well when you are an adult you can date whoever you want - so say you do become a teacher and after finishing your studies you teach at that school, and this man in question still works there, then theoretically there is no problem in dating him.
But the chances of all that happening are very slim so dont get your hopes up!
1. When you qualify as a teacher there may not be a job at that specific school for you
2. Even if you get a job at that school, this man you have a crush on may no longer work there
3. The age difference - he will be a lot older than you so if he is not already married the chances are by the time you are a teacher he will be married, maybe with kids...or at least in a long term relationship
4. dating someone you work with is not always advisable - in a relationship you need time away from that person, and work is the best place to do this. I love my boyfriend very much but if I worked with him, and then went home with him too, he would drive me mad! You need space in a relationship otherwise you suffocate each other. Plus when you have a row and then work in the same environment it is very hard to keep your private life seperate from your work life, which may compromise your job as you are not as professional as you could be.
And if you didnt work at the school - well as long as you were over the age of consent in your state, no longer a student and an adult (i.e. 18+) then again theoretically there would be no problem. It is generally frowned upon a bit to date former students but if you are an adult and no longer a student at the school then there are no real reasons why you cannot date.
But for now, seen as you are 15 - there is not a lot you can do about it so try not to think too much about this crush. Your teacher cannot get involved with you at your age, and even while you are still at the school as a student because he would be abusing his position, plus he has a responsiblity for your welfare and he would be taking advantage of you if he became involved. You are still a young impressionable girl and he would be a pedophile for getting involved with a child. So it is best for everyone if you just let this go for now, dont do anything silly and just wait until your feelings for him subside a little (which they will in time). Focus on your studies and make sure you acheieve your dream of being a teacher - you will need to work hard to make sure you can be a teacher so study hard now and you will get there!
I hope this helps and good luck!
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