| A
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: hi evry one i have a serious problem,my boyfriend have got sex problem first i thought may it was me then i cheated with another guy but dat guy was fine.i love him and i want to stop cheating but my problem is he don't satsfy me,i have tried every thing to turn him on but i fail its always goes soft and this is killing me inside.its been years now i asked my friends they thought maybe he don't hav fellings for me,i dnt know is it possible to be with someone for years if u dnt have felings for them?i've tried to ask him about it but im scared that he wil be angry on me,sometyms when it gets hard he goes in fast and 1min he finished.plz help me is there a serious problem or its true he dont have feelings for me cause he dnt drink/ use drugs nothing i can suspect about this.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, yankit  +, writes (18 November 2009):
There are toys(marital aids) that'll substitute for the loss of hardness. you might want to introduce some kink into the relationship
A
female
reader, BlueBag  +, writes (18 November 2009):
 If he has never been able to keep hard whilst having sex then he could have a problem. I would suggest you speak to him and ask him to get himself checked out.
However, you clearly know cheating is not the answer here. So I would suggest for you not to go down that route again.
There are other ways he can please you without having full penetrative sex. Oral, manual stimulation, toys for example. Tell him how you would like him to please you. Guys normally love being given tips.
The key to any long term relationship is communication. Without it, you don't stand a chance. You NEED to talk to him.
Good luck. Keep us updated :)
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 November 2009): Yes you can be with someone for many years even if there isn't love there. But this doesn't seem to be the case. He has the problem, i doubt it has anything to do with you. Have you ever heard of erectile dis-function and premature ejaculation? I could say it's erectile dis-function, but it sounds more like premature ejaculation. Are you sure you love him? Because if you really do then you should STOP CHEATING!! And care more about him than your sexual hunger! Be a little more considerate please. How would you feel if you were the one with a similar problem and he went behind your back to get sex from other girls?? You wouldn't like that Right?? Well here are some helpful links that might be of use to you: 1st website is about premature ejaculation and the 2nd website is about erectile dis-function
http://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/ency/article/001524.htm
http://kidney.niddk.nih.gov/kudiseases/pubs/impotence/
by the way my ex had the same problem of keeping it up...but I dealt with it because I loved him and it wasn't his fault he had this problem. Things like these just happen. Just know you're not the only one with that problem. And if you feel you will continue to cheat then just break up with him and stop hurting him like this. That's torture for him, it's sad. :'(
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