A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Im 8 weeks pregnant and boyfriend wants abortion and has already dumped me! he says he has a 6 month baby and is not prepared to have another baby and we were together for only 2 months! i want to keep the baby but im afraid of being a single mom. im feeling sad and lonely and really dont know what to do. i cant stop crying because i still love him. am i making a mistake keeping a baby of a 2 month relationship???
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 December 2010): I am a single mom, I didn't think I wanted to keep my child when I was pregnant, but I did, I was unsure of what to do the whole time I was pregnant. But the day he was born, it was amazing, as soon as I saw him, I knew he had my heart, and that everything would be okay. It didn't matter what the situation was with his technical sperm donor of a father, my relationship with my son was so much more important than anything that happened or didn't happen between me and his bio-dad. Your family support will help to make things easier, it is great that they are there for you and your child. Even when things get tough in life as they do at some point or another, when you hold that baby in your arms, you will know you made the right choice. It doesn't matter who the dad is, you are the Mommy. Good Luck.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 December 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionDreamer 1988 thank you very much for your words! I believe everything happens for a reason! Thank you all for your advices. ill keep the baby and do everything i can to make this child a happy child and give him/her everything a baby needs!
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A
female
reader, Dreamer1988  +, writes (29 December 2010):
 There are plenty of single moms out there. The child is not going or care that it was a 2 month relationship. They are going to be more concerned with getting fed, dressed, being taken care of, and shown attention. If you feel that you can properly bring a baby into the world, then this 2 month relationship shouldn't matter. I also say this, because plenty of parents now are divorced, and are kids now saying that because their parents are divorced they wish they were never born? Maybe, but... mostly, they are happy that they have been given life. It's a beautiful gift and a beautiful thing! So, if your baby has enough support, and you WANT it, then I don't see why you shouldn't have your baby. Everything happens for a reason. And hopefully you can meet a man who cares about you and your child- but right now, focus on you and your baby...
However, if you don't want the child, you shouldn't feel guilty about that either. There is nothing wrong with waiting- I would just suggest having it, and then giving it up for adoption. Good luck again!!
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reader, anonymous, writes (29 December 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI have decided to keep the baby! I think im ready to be a single mom, ive gone to college and im curently doing master. i can afford a child by myself and thats not the issue! My family and friends support me. I just dont know if its right to keep a baby of a 2 months relationship! will i regreat one day having taken this decision??? Isnt he right for saying we dont know each other very well to have this baby???
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 December 2010): Can u give this baby a decent life?Do u have Good job?Family and friends support?I have said it before on DC and will repeat :Abortion/termination is not a dirty word. It is a necessity in situations like yours. You are not ready for a baby, you will also start resenting it when born.Hun, you will save yourself from a lifelong commitment by terminating this pregnancy. Your ex doesn't want this baby and it is unplanned.Just my thoughts....LoveGirl
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A
male
reader, rcn +, writes (28 December 2010):
 Forget about the relationship for a moment. Are you wrong for wanting to keep your baby? Absolutely not. He got your pregnant then left, you're much better off as being a single mom than you would be with him. This is your baby, don't let him tell you not to have it. This is not his decision to make. He has another child. You child is just as important and has the right to life as his other child. It can be scary being a single parent. Although I am a guy, I know that it is because I am one. I am solely responsible for meals, homework, baths, bedtime, etc., but I wouldn't give up what I have for anything. Being a parent means responsibility, but there are so many benefits to being one. I hope this helps. Take care.
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A
female
reader, cat lady +, writes (28 December 2010):
 I don't wish to make you feel yet worse if you are sincere in your post but I still have to ask: Are you kidding us??That done, if you're not playing around here, I'll just point out the obvious:One of the burdens of getting yourself into adult situations before you're ready is that you are stuck with adult decisions and you have to do it all by yourself. I mean it. You can discuss it with whomever you like till you're tired of hearing it and still, all by yourself you have to choose. Now you have to grab the steering wheel and drive for yourself and you'll never be able to take your hands off the wheel again - unless you want to end up over a cliff. Bye, bye, childhood. Every adult, at least privately, remembers that horrible realization because we all had to come to it.Nobody with any decency on any website in the world would dream of trying to tell you how to make a terribly important, life-or-death decision like this! If you did not already have the answer to that decided two months ago, both you and that flighty boyfriend were too young to be having sex. You're the one who has to be smart and practical now and if you don't mind me saying so, it's as well boyfriend is out of your hair temporarily so you can think straight.Try to see this from a possible child's perspective: what kind of mother and father are you? What kind do you want to be? Being afraid of single motherhood is understandable; parenthood scares everybody. Profound change scares everybody. But, never be afraid to do what your heart tells you is the right thing. If you're not afraid to live according to your principles, you may be inconvenienced but you'll never be lost. Do you think you're ready to grow up - fast? Nature has helped you into an adult situation and adults do not let other people make their life choices for them. Let us call it, 'the loneliness of command"? Command over your own person-hood and full responsibility for your own decisions. It's scary but it's worth it. Face it and you might even find that you're tougher than you think!
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female
reader, impatientlywaiting +, writes (28 December 2010):
The decision that you make will affect the rest of your life so just be sure that you make the one that's right for you. Are you ready to be a single mom?Have you gone or do you have any plans to go to college?Can you financially afford a child by yourself?Do you have a stable environment to raise a child in?Are you able to wait to have children until you are mentally and emotionally ready?Would you rather have a partner to help you raise a child?Have you considered adoption?You need to seriously think about your future, you are young and still have a lifetime to have children.
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A
female
reader, Dreamer1988 +, writes (28 December 2010):
It's up to you, since it's your baby. Personally, I would get an abortion- but I am just saying that because I have never been in your situation. What I suggest you do though is assume the father is not going to be there, since he already dumped you. Once you imagine the scenario where he is not there, it might be easier for you to decide what you want to do. Are you ready to be the mother of a child who will grow up without a father? Are you also ready to be a mother period? (This baby will be looking up to YOU. Can you handle that?) Do you have enough resources to support the baby? If you don't, you might consider having it, and then giving it up for adoption rather than having an abortion.It's your choice- the father can't make you do anything. The baby is helpless and will rely on you for help. So, think about that too. Is it fair to put a child through this? Also, the father is an a-hole if he wants to nothing to do with his baby. I hope you find someone way better. Good luck
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