A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hiya, i have a real bad problem. For about 8 months now ive really really fancied my teacher, and its beyond a crush, i kind of love him. Hes all im thinking about to be honest. Lately its getting so bad, that when i start college, im gonig to go back to school to pick coursework up and i think i want to tell him how i feel. I'll get a friend to do it for me obviously because i really cant stand no more feeling like this. I feel like he needs to know because its been 8 very long months. I was so close to saying something to him at school, i even wrote hima letter explaning how if feel but my mum found it, and if you ask me she wasnt very happy. She told me just to forget about him and get a boyfriend my own age, truth is i want him... She dont understand that its hard to stop thinking of someone right away and it takes time! Im hurting and i feel nothing but pain all the time. Im heartbroken, and have been for ages over him. Should i get a friend to tell him how i feel? Or just carry on feeling this way?.....
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female
reader, Preeti dey  +, writes (1 August 2010):
Dear,expressing ur feelings is a brilliant job. According 2 me if u tell ur feelings urself it will give a deep impact on him.there will b no guarantee 4 his acceptance of ur proposal bt dere will b a guarantee of his sympathy 2wards u.
A
female
reader, hey2u2  +, writes (3 March 2010):
omg i am so sad just reading ur story. i feel the same about my teacher, except he's like 7 to 8 years older than me which isnt that bad i guess . but i've liked him for a while now too. i want to tell him but not get him in trouble n i know he couldnt like me back cus he has a gf. anyway i feel nothing but sadness all the time too. thats why im here to find out what to do too. plz let me know what u ended up doing.
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female
reader, Sputnixx +, writes (24 July 2008):
You wrote: "Should i get a friend to tell him how i feel? Or just carry on feeling this way?....."
Listen, if you need a friend to tell him how you feel.. you OBVIOUSLY aren't at a maturity level to be involved in a relationship with an older man... teacher or not. If you respected his career you also would not go around telling people in your school that you love him (even if it is a close friend.) He is a full grown man.. with a life, career, bills, etc etc etc. You do not want to mess around with his life. Rumors start when word gets out about something like this and you don't want that to happen. You see him as your teacher that you have feelings for... but he's also somebody's son.. somebody's uncle. For all you know he could be somebody's dad... I don't think there is anything wrong with an age difference in general (putting the whole teacher thing aside) if both people are around the same maturity level and place in life. I really feel you aren't right now... and it's important that you understand this.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 May 2008): kk i kno this question is reli old but i wanted 2 add my answer ne way lol.
I reli don't think u shud tell him. He cud lose his job because of it. I know you don't mean for that to happen, but schools take this kind of thing VERY seriously.
I totally understand what you are going through, i have been in love (i think it's love ne way!) with my physics teacher for almost a year now. He is all i think about and i'm well and truly obessesed. Trust me, i googled him and everything!
It really hurts me sometimes because I know we can never be together but even so I know that telling him would be such a bad idea. I know it feels like these feelings will never stop and the last thing i want to tell you is that it is 'just a phase' which is the worst bit of advice i ever heard! I suggest that you just try to accept the facts; he's a teacher and a realtionship would most likely end in tears. You don't want to jeopardise what relationship you already have. I couldn't bear it if he had to stop teaching me or ignored me (well more than usual!)
Talk to people about it too. Just reading these comments made me feel a lot better....i'm not the only one! Also quite a few of my friends like the same teacher (maybe not quite as obessesively as me tho!) and talking to them about it really helps. Before I had the courage to tell ne one tho, i also kept a diary about it, which was also surprisingly theraputic.
My advice to ne 1 in a situation where they like a teacher is try not to let it get you down or rule your life (i know it's soooo hard.) Talk about your feelings (seriously it helps) and don't tell the teacher about your feelings, more often than not it will go horribly wrong. If you are anything like me, you may hate the way you feel, but trust me loads of people feel the same way.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 May 2008): hey just came across this and you cannot tell him.
he has his own feelings and if he did like you back, trust me you would know.
my friend told a teacher she liked them and he got a restraining order put against her and now she has to keep out of his way at skool or she could get kicked out.
please dont tell him as it could ruin your life and his.
hope this helped x
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 May 2008): I know exactly how all of you feel. I love my teacher too, and because i am so deeply in love, i realise if i stay at this school, i will do something that might jepodise his career, and reputation. So i applied for college, and got in. And now im going to be leaving all my friends behind, and him. He teaches me spanish and i cant help but blush when he looks at me, or sits next to me. I feel so bad because i shouldnt be feeling what im feeling. I know he will never feel the same way, but i want him to. I at least want him to know, if you know what i mean???? Hes slightly older than what i would expect, well, alot older. But i dont care really, all i think about last thing at night, is him, and the first thing in the morning. I know this is love for me, and that i have to let go now. But its so hard too. I even search his name on google, just so i can feel closer to him if i find anything on him.You know what i mean?? I want to tell him how i feel, i just dont know how, i need advice on that, so if anyone knows anything, please leave a response.I feel like id do anything for him, even though to him i am just another student. I feel so much closer to the world now, knowing other people are suffering the exact same problem too.What i dont get is why people tell me 'its just a phrase, it will pass' when it feels like it will go on forever? like its some gigantic cage that will never let you go, and you will never die either, so your just trapped.Whatever happens, i hope i can still be friends with him, hes the only one that has ever believed in me before.I trust him, i love him.Nad
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 May 2008): I'am HEAD OVER HEELS in love with my teacher as well. I know exactly how you feel. I'am often sad and I can't stop thinking about him. I'd tell him to his face if I were you. But I know how hard it is to approach that subject when you see him in school. It might help a bit if you cry, if he's a real gentlemen, then he'll hug you. This pain sucks I want it to go away, but it wont cuz I know I'll never have him :( Good luck to every girl out there who's in a similar situation.
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female
reader, Angels Eyes +, writes (12 May 2008):
 OMG i hve the exact sme problem!!Ok babe i hve a massive crush on my science teacher but then my friends told him!!And ever since he has became very distant and i used to talk to him quite alot but when i try he ignores me or walks away!!So my advice is SO NOT TELL HIM OR WRITE A LETTER!!!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 March 2008): i a so in love with my teacher as well, but i'm waiting until i leave school before i tell him, that way if he rejects you, you wont feel awkward for ages around each other. i'm going to tell him face to face in a private, secure room, and im not going to get anyone else involved because then he'll just feel like everyone knows and'll get all worried, and besides, he probably won't want to speak to you after that - involving a friend is the biggest mistake. i really hope everything works out ok for you. at least you actually have a friend to talk to about it; all i have is my diary and my obese ginger cat( who is actually quite a good listener). i can so relate to you in this situation. it would be brilliant to have someone i could talk with about this stuff, i've been writing somethingon every one of these "i'm in love ith my teacher" pages. id give anything for him to love me back. tell him how you feel - you have nothing to lose, and who knows how things could turn out. could you write back and tell all us other lovesick teenagers how it worked out? i really hope everything works out OK for you.
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reader, anonymous, writes (14 December 2007): Ok hun,- this is what happened to my friend when i was at school. She loved her science teacher, thought he liked her back, ended up writing her science teacher a letter and her friend gave it to him.Ultimately, he took it badly, inmformed other staff, and she ended up on a sexual harrassment charge and had the head telling her off. This teacher then avoided her for a year. Be very careful, ive worked in schools for 4 years and staff have to protect themselves against accusations and stuff, so i can guarantee he'll tell other members of staff to cover his back. Is it worth the humilation? My friend would tell you no.
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reader, anonymous, writes (14 December 2007): i feel the same way about my old teacher (10 year age difference). i'm not in his class anymore or even at the same school and all i think about is him. i would wait until you graduate and turn 18 to tell him how you really feel.
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reader, estc girl  +, writes (12 November 2007):
i like my teacher not love like but hes all i think about and im only 15. I try to keep it quiet ana i try to like other guys but it doesn't work... I try to impress him but I feel like a stupid teen. Really stupid, im knawing on my pencil right now im so sad and irritated becouse he doesn't know. I just met him this year and the 1st time i saw him I felt it. If I were as old as u I would work the courage to tell him. If u love him u have good reason. He must be a good guy so hell probably understand. u will be ok please put up what happens! ;D
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reader, secrets-x-sh! +, writes (13 September 2007):
 Hey i know the same feelings!!!!
Me & my friend think lotsa teachers are fitt and stuff and our friends sometimes think we are a little sad but only my best friend knows im actually in love with a teacher.
Hes in his 20s i think and im only 15! which really bugs me, its like i would do anything just to see him like go past his class and stuff (kinda obsessive) but i cant help it, i feel like the mosre i cant have him the more i like him & hes not even THAT goodlooking its just his personality it really has an effect on me,and when i see him itl give me butterflys or il get a fright or something its wel embaressing.
The weird thing is i do get vibes he likes me too, He always winks at me and smiles and when im talking to him gives me eye contact, im probably being obsessive but my friends think hes flirty too with me, hes kinda like tht though, abit like me cant help but flirt when hes talking to the opposite sex, i always get told =\.
Anyway m adivice youl just have to try and get over him, i mean i know its well hard because my teacher is always on my mind too, before i go to bed, in school anything which reminds me of him LOL , i know i sound gay but thts how i am.
I thort the 6 weeks holidays (not seeing him) would get me over him, but it didnt hes still on my mind and now im bk to school i like him more =\ .
How ever much you wna tell this guy, DONT.
i would love to tell my teacher how i feel and know what he feels for me!! but i know i cant, i mean if use are meant to be together and hes not too old youl meet when your older and maybes old enuf for him, just dont tell him he could loose his job and youl loose your friendship with him, if he doesnt feel the same way. just hold tight try and hit on guys your age or a few years older get your mind off him.
I know its hard but its life.
Try your best. Thats what im doing .
=] dont worry its normal iv heard, i mean you do spend most of your days with them its hard not to be attracted to one.
Goodluck !
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reader, anonymous, writes (8 September 2007): awwww hunni I feel the same way about my science teacher he knows i like him because rumours are going around the school but we just ignore them its hard to control your feelings as i write eveything he says to me in my diary dont tell him you love him because it may loose him his job hope you get through this
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 September 2007): Hey, I know how you feel, because I feel as though I 'love' my guitar teacher, who is 36, and I'm only 14 :(I can't stop thinking about him, I used to get lessons with him just so I could have half an hour with him, and I would always write in my diary about him. Its been going on for one year now and I know that I cant have him.The realisation is hard, I know, but you HAVE to get over this guy. It would look bad when you are together, and plus you are probably not in love, you just think you are. Its just a teen obsession, I've realised that now. But i still look all over the internet for him because he's in bands- how sad! You just have to say to yourself-Would it really work?He might lose his job.Is he worth it?Do you feel embarrassed around him?I wish you luck coz I know how you feel, it sucks thinking about someone for so long. Over the summer is the worst, because they are constantly on your mind. Just go back to school, take a last look at him, approach him and just have a normal convo. Then turn your back on him and leave him be!hope I helped,xxx
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female
reader, DIE-romantic. +, writes (1 September 2007):
 Well, as your leaving school, I suppose it isnt as bad as you still attending there, it may be awkward between you. So, even if it does make you look abit silly, you wont have to face embarrassment and nobody else will have to know. Id tell him, face to face, not getting anyone else involved, he wouldnt respect it if you got a friend to. Its like what little year 6's do. He would respect you and treat you as an adult if you told him yourself. At least, it will get it off your chest, and he will know, you may be able to move on after that. And in the future you may look back and regret not saying anything, wondering what could of happened. Because he may feel the same way. You dont know. He wont get into trouble, (well not as much, but i still wouldnt say anything) and neither will you. Good luck, take care and message me whenever you want for more advise.xxxxxxxxxxx
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reader, lillaum +, writes (31 August 2007):
 Who hasn't had some type of crush on a teacher? Your love for your teacher is not un common at all loads of people go through this at some point. But for gods sake dont tell him, dont be suggestive, dont corner him or do anything else like that. He could get in to such serious trouble that even if he liked you before he wouldnt once you have ruined his career. just leave him alone, and get ready for the boys you will meet in college!!! now once you have met one of them you will realise that you only had a crush on your teacher and it wasn't love. Plus, imagine if you did go out with your teacher... You would never have the type of acceptance you would get from going out with a cute college guy!! You will also have so much more in common with some who is at the same stage in their life as you are.Go get the boys at college!!Lillaumxx
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reader, tracyann +, writes (30 August 2007):
If you say anything to him you will just make yourself look silly.. he will not feel the same and you will just ruin your education. if he liked you you would know , trust me , but teachers do not look at there pupils like that, you are too young and need to grow up
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reader, Love_is_all_youu_need +, writes (30 August 2007):
 Hunni, i'm so touched by your post - I know EXACTLY how it feels! I'm 15 and luckily have yet another year at my school and have the opportunity to see my teacher everyday :P I desperately wanna tell him how i feel, and this 6 week holiday have driven me MAD! I really dunno how i've got thru it wivout seeing him, weekends are bad enuf! But i can understand that you're feeling worse than i am since you won't be at that school no more and will only see him occasionally... I think rather than you suffer as you are, that you should tell him - YOURSELF! I know it seems like mission impossible and most likely will not achieve anything but however, at least it will be off your chest and i imagine it will help you cope better with your feelings. Getting a friend to do it may give him the impression you're a coward and he wont know TRULY how you feel cos you're lettin a friend say it who obviously doesn't know your feelings as much as you do! I have a couple of close friends who know about my obsessive crush but they really haven't the slightest clue how i really do feel - I don't tell them everything, because alot of it is personal which i like to keep to myself! Hunni, i know it may be hard but if you want him to know, then tell him! But go the right way about it, get him alone in his room - without anyone else present and just let out your feelings but try not to act to desperate as he may be 'freaked out' just say briefly how you feel and that u just wanted to express your feelings before you leave to college! I can't tell you how he'll respond but just keep what you have to say to a minimum and i'm sure he'll be flattered!Please do contact me either by replying to this post or by personal message! I really wanna support you :) And i truly do understand how you feel, i shall be very glad to help you in any way! All my love xxx
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 August 2007): hey
What they say is right, you shouldnt persue him, there may be a tiny chance that he likes you but to tell you the truth he wouldnt act upon it because he would lose his job, because its illigal for a teacher to have relationships with under 18 yrs old. If you get your friend to tell him he might take it as a joke and wouldnt say anything. Maybe its best if you do tell him, because at least then you have the chance of getting over him, because you will either know if he does or doesnt like you.
so good luck
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female
reader, penta +, writes (30 August 2007):
 If you care anything for this man, do NOT pursue him. Having any kind of relationship with you will RUIN his career. If you try to tell him how you feel it will be the most selfish thing you have ever done. As a teacher he CAN NOT date a student. He'll be fired, and no other school will hire him. Think of him, whom you supposedly love, and keep your feelings to yourself. Don't even tell your friends -- the gossip will start and his career could be ruined even if you don't do anything.
If you still love him, years from now when you're not a student, you can say something then. But for now please do what your mom is suggesting.
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reader, jezz +, writes (30 August 2007):
 well with you leaving school and not seeing him as much it will be a lot easier to get over him. i think you would make a really big mistake if you told him your feelings. i have been in the same position and it only causes you more pain by telling him. good luck chick x
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reader, 88jane +, writes (30 August 2007):
 ok sweetheart now this is not what you want to hear but you cannot take this feeling for your teacher any further! you cant help who you fall in love with and its such a shame that you have fallen for someone that you cant have! it would be wrong for your teacher to have a relationship with you and he could get into a lot of trouble and even lose his job! would you want him to lose everything?have you had any signs that your teacher likes you? becuase all you have mentioned is your feelings but you havent said anything about him acting in a way which may mean he likes you back! you could get extremely heart broken if you tell him how you feel and he doesnt feel the same way! you need to think about it like this, the relationship would not be appropriate even if he did like you too so the only option is to try and get over him!! easier said than done i know but your mum is right, you need to find someone your own age who likes you too!get a new hobby, focus on your college work, hang out with your friends...do anything to take your mind off this guy!this is such a common problem with people falling for inappropriate people...at the moment i have incredibly strong feelings for my female best friend which i have been trying to get rid of for 9 months so believe me i know what it feels like wondering if they would like you too, wondering if you should tell them! if this guy wasnt your teacher then it would be a different story and i would suggest telling him but unfortunately, no good could come of you telling him!Good luck hunny, its not going to be easy but you will get over him!mail me if you feel you need to chat further! i may be able to help further as i have a similar situation!!jane xxx
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 August 2007): Whoahh this guy is WELL out of your reach! Your mum is right - you need a guy your own age.And if this is any help - I doubt very much that you love him! You are probably infatuated with him, which means that you fancy him so much that you feel you love him. However, I think it is best if you don't tell him how you feel. He is most likely married or has a girlfriend at least. Keep a busy life to distract yourself from him, perhaps that will help. And about persistently going back to the school meaning to tell him is a bad idea. The more you see him, the worse! Try really hard to avoid seeing him altogether, and your feelings should subside a bit. Hormones are everywhere at your age, and most girls are likely to get a crush on their teachers at some point, because at the end of the day, they are important role models in your lives. I don't think getting a friend to tell him would be too clever an idea either! He may think it is some ludicrous joke! Can you imagine his reaction if he found out that one of his pupils felt she was in love with him? I'm sorry to tell you, but somebody has to, that I doubt very much he feels the same way about you as you do about him.So, just keep yourself busy as a means to distract yourself, and try and avoid seeing him or talking with him as much as possible. This should slowly calm your feelings down for him. I know this really does sound pointless advice if you like him as much as you do, but stick to it, flirt with younger and more suitable guys. If you do, I doubt very much that you will think you love him the same way you do within a few months! After all, thinking about one person for 8 months solid is no fun for anybody! X
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