A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:I have a big problem. I'm 14. I've fallen in love with my 35 year old geography teacher. I've liked him for a few months and last week I told him how I feel. I wrote it in a letter and got my friend to give it to him because she had his lesson next. Later that day I emailed his school asking if he had got the letter and he emailed back saying 'Yes. We'll leave it at that. Business as usual.' I had his lesson on Friday and he acted normally. I was freaking out because I was just scared that he would ignore me but he didn't. He even smiled at me alot. He is quite good looking and has a really good body. I like him because of his personality not because of his looks. I think about him all of the time. In lessons, at home, in bed, at a friends house and in my dreams. In geography I try sooo hard to impress him and it normally works. When he walks past me or looks at me I feel all weird inside. I don't know if I should try anything or not. I think I love him and it's more than a crush. Much more. I want to try something, anything. He is the perfect person for me. I know it's illegal for him to do something but I love him so much. I know he could lose his job and go to prison but I don't know how much longer I can go without him. I want to try something so much. Do you think I should?? I need some help quickly please!!! Thank youu!
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female
reader, florence2020 +, writes (13 November 2012):
Look Im in the same situation it is nice to have a little fantasy but we have to knock him outa our mind ik that it is rly rlly rlly hard cus u think he is the one but if you think aout it how mature he is just like i did the past few weeks u will realise that unfortunately it wouldnt work out and to be honest i would rather be a respected student who keeps friendship with the teacher than a student who can ruin his life.... btw my teacher is a geography teacher too but trust me do not do anything with him it could end as a disaster and in the nicest way possible nothin will happen :/ well its life i guess but im sure ull find the one guy who is the one 4 u goodluck girl
A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 July 2010): He sounds like a nice guy, but if you really like him you should just try and move on. It is extremely doubtful that he would jepordise his career for a 14 yr old anyway
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A
female
reader, KiaGrace  +, writes (18 February 2009):
 Sorry sweetie, doubt that he feels the same way..he is just trying to be professional.Move on.. theres plently of fish in the sea.He's not going to through his life away for a fourteen year old girl.. trust me.
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A
female
reader, aunty_rach +, writes (17 February 2009):
also just because you enjoy geography does not mean he is going to throw his life away by making the stupid mistake of dating a CHILD!
you wouldn't have anything in common with him. he has been through so much more then you. you are still a CHILD and he is an ADULT who has been to uni, got a degree and teaching qualifications which probably took him 4 or so years to get. for what...to throw away on a CHILD who has a crush on him? i doubt it very much. he is an adult who is probably into going to pubs,clubs,etc and has friends who are in their 30's. what would he have in common with a 14 year old CHILD! NOTHING! trust me, i'm in my 20's and the thought makes me feel disgusting. it would be like me or someone my age dating a 14 year old boy. it's perverse and very very wrong. only perverts try it on with little kids and they end up in JAIL! i know you probably think you are all grown up, but you're not! you are a 14 year old CHILD! i keep saying that because i think you need it drilled into your head. NOTHING can happen! leave him alone and get on with being a kid.
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A
male
reader, anoms +, writes (17 February 2009):
 can you honestly say that a teacher well over double your age is the only man for you because he's got blue eyes, he surfs and has a good sense of humour, im sorry but your going to go through many a crush through the years, yes you've taken the first step by telling him your feelings but lets say somthing does come of this..sex! then what? he's going to quit his job? and marry you? there is no happy ending for anyone in this situation, you need to be mature and not try to entice an older guy into a relationship with you, its just bad news for everyone, and remember the law makes you the victim in this. do the right thing and dont take this any further, leave it at "business as usual" gudluk.
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A
female
reader, aunty_rach +, writes (17 February 2009):
no you can't. because he would end up going to prison for rape of a minor. because you are under the age on consent.
also he probably has his own life, a girlfriend,wife, kids... all you are to him is a student. at the end of the day he goes home and forgets about you! he leaves work in the classroom. why would a 30 something year old guy be interested in a 14 year old child anyway?!? seriously stick to guys your own age. nothing can happen!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 February 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI do focus on my studies. A lot. I know it's just a phase. And yes, I do want people to give me ideas on how to get him to like me.
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen  +, writes (17 February 2009):
 You don't want help, you want people to give you ideas how you can give your teacher the "come on". Nobody here who has any sense is going to do that. Focus on your studies and stay busy, this too shall pass.
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 February 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionIt's so weird to see all of you replying to my question. I wanted to write more about how I feel but I didn't know how to describe everything. Basically, because I like him I have started to really enjoy geography and I have chosen it as a GCSE but all of my friends think it is just because I like him but that isn't it. He is a good teacher which makes me like it. Most of this isn't going to make much sense. Sorry. I like him because he is friendly, generous, clever, kind, and he likes to help people out. He has never said anything to offend me and he acts flirty. I know that it is because he is a teacher and he has to be nice and has been trained to be caring and trustworthy but it always seems like more. He laughs at silly things that I say and he is very funny himself. He surfs alot too. Now he knows that I like him I was positive that it would be awkward but it wasn't too bad. I want him so badly. I think about him all of the time. I want to wait until I leave school in 2 and a half years but I don't think I can. I often get told I am mature for my age and I want him so much. He sometimes looks at me and he has these really intense electric blue eyes. I have tried to stop liking him by fancying a boy my own age but I can't do it. He just keeps filling my mind. I try hard in all my classes just incase he looks at my report or something. I know I am stupid, but I can't help it! Thank you for your help! x
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 February 2009): i know how you feel, i have been in the same situation, so i understand exactly what your going through, but at the end of the day. sometimes you just cant always have what you want in life. and this is one of those occasions.
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A
male
reader, anoms +, writes (17 February 2009):
you wouldnt believe how often ive seen this post in the last seven days alone! you know ensactly why everything is so wrong about it but you have to tell yourself that you only want him because its so wrong! lets be honest, its more of a challenge and thats the enjoyment or the kick that your feeling, you cannot say that you trully love a man that you have zero social background with as in you dont know him outside of school and you dont know anything about his personal life, you really need to be glad he is leaving this at that. the only warning i will give you from here is the letter you sent him! if somthing does esalate and he feels like obliging you then he has the upper hand if the law ever comes into this. i dont know what the letter said, somthing along the lines of being together im sure, but it would look very good in his defence if he were to take you up on your offer, be carfull, stay safe good luck.
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (17 February 2009):
You should see all the postings we get from young ladies with schoolgirl crushes. Of course it's a crush and nothing more. You can stay in denial if you want but sooner or later you will snap out of it and see this for what it is. We had a teenager who posted about her crush for over a year, she wouldn't listen to the wonderful advice she got, she just wanted to use this website to dwell on her fantasies. It got to be very tiresome. Focus on your studies until this dissipates.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 February 2009): Youre so immature.. I hope you do realize that!
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A
female
reader, deejuliet +, writes (17 February 2009):
 Love means caring more about the welfare and well being of the other person than your own, selfish wants and desires. If you really love this guy you will LEAVE HIM ALONE!!!! As you already stated BECAUSE OF YOU this guy could get fired or even go to jail. Is it the loving thing to get someone fired and sent to jail? Is that how you show your affection for someone? Also, I will point out that he got you letter and stated that it was "business as usual" which let me translate for you. It means "I got your letter and I do not want to hurt your feelings by telling that I am completely uninterested. And I most certainly do not want to encourage you! So we are going to pretend that this never happened and go on, bussiness as usual."
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A
female
reader, TannedDoll  +, writes (17 February 2009):
 He's a teacher. You're a student. You're still 14. I think that you will have many more crushes in the future. To be honest, I don't think that he has feelings for you. Perhaps he's in love with a woman already. How would you now? If not, he's still much older and more responsible. Can't you see that he's being mature? You should try that to. Just forget. YOu'll realize in the future how crazy and childlish you were :p because I has crushes on teachers too. I thought I was in love with them and we would actually go out!! How stupid was I. :p
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