A
female
age
26-29,
*ONAM LOVE DORJEEE
writes:my boyfriend loves me but he wants to have sex with me and i don't want to, what should i do with my boyfriend? although we can't break up because I LOVE HIM Reply to this Question
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female
reader, totty-flossy  +, writes (6 June 2011):
 I was in the same situation when i was 15 and it's ok everyone else telling you to leave him if he wont accept that you don't want sex yet, but i can understand that when your feelings are involved and you love someone, you will do anything to keep them! I ended up sleeping with my boyfriend and still regret it to this day! We broke up about 2 months later because he cheated on me! I wish I had waited until I was a bit older and had been with someone who was willing to wait until I was ready!
I'm not trying to be patronising or anything but you are too young to have sex and you may not regret it right away but eventually you will! If your boyfriend loves you he will wait! You need to tell him that your not ready yet! I know its hard but if this guy really isn't willing to wait then he really isn't right for you and your going to have to be very brave and mature and end the relationship! I know that seems scary because it will hurt at first but you will get over him and feel much better for leaving him!
If your boyfriend says he will wait you have to explain to him that you don't want him to keep asking you about sex and that you will let him know when your ready! It may be a few months or a year but if he cares about you he will stick around. When you eventually feel ready to have sex make sure you use protection and make sure you have real feelings for the person you choose to do it with! Remember you only have one life and loosing your virginity is one of those things you can only do once so there are no second chances! Make sure everything is perfect and feels completely right and it is something you will remember forever for all the right reasons!
xxxx
A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (6 June 2011):
 If he doesn't respect your wishes to not have sex, then he doesn't love you as much as you think he does. You need to leave him if he will not accept that you do not want to have sex, even if you love him.
In your culture, is it acceptable to have sex before marriage? Understand that you can fall pregnant, and your boyfriend will not stick around if you do, I am sure he will run for the hills and find himself a new girlfriend to have sex with. Some men are selfish, especially young men. So, say NO, and do not give in to him.
If he wants sex he must wait until you are old enough for marriage and marry you.
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A
female
reader, lacrymosa_652 +, writes (6 June 2011):
 Don't have sex with him. He should respect your decision and if he keeps pushing you then he's not worth being with. Don't let your feelings for him cloud your judgement. Anyway, you're too young to have sex and it would be illegal. Wait until you're old enough. Don't have sex with somebody at this age, you'll only regret it when you're older.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (6 June 2011):
 you must tell him that you are not ready. He should respect that.
IF He insists that you do something that you do not want to do you must accept that he does not love you back the right way and must consider ending the relationship
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A
female
reader, heather016  +, writes (6 June 2011):
you're 13-15... don't do it unless you want to. don't do it just because they want you to do so.
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A
female
reader, Dorothy Dix +, writes (6 June 2011):
Hi there. Just be honest with him.
If you aren't ready to go that extra step, tell him so right up front. It's your right. He can't force you.
Even though you say you love him, if he isn't happy to wait for you to be ready, well then that's his problem not yours.
Whatever you do, don't go ahead and have sex with him just because he wants it. If he isn't happy with your refusal, tell him he can find it elsewhere, because you just are not ready and you won't be rushed into something that you consider to be really important to you. To have sex is a huge step in anyone's life, so don't take the decision lightly.
It's your choice and your body. Don't be railroaded into something you don't feel is right for you right now. Don't allow him to make you feel guilty about it either.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 June 2011): Well, don't force youreself to do anything. If he's really eager to have sex you should talk to him. I also think you're a little insecure. But that's absolutly fine. If he's forcing you then you have to think twice before starting a life together. Its not a good thing to force you're partner for sexual pleasures. I think you should have sex when you're ready. Not when you're under pressure.
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