A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Ok, Here goes.There is an attractive girl. We have really been talking recently and getting to know each other really well recently. I know she likes me. She thinks I'm nice, she even told me she thinks I'm cute. Today, we were talking and she told me that she has had two dreams about me, curious, I asked for more information. She said it was about us being close and together.She has been going through a rough time lately; she has recently gotten out of a relationship that she jumped into too soon. She told me that all of her relationships have ended badly.I took the dream thing to be a lead on, but my assumptions were wrong. She just kind of naturally flirts. After perusing it, she said that she just wanted to be friends for a while. I want her, but I don't want to rush her. Also, we've been talking about it. She told me to do what I feel is right.I have a few options that I think fit.1-Leave her, stop talking to her, and try to completely forget about her; therefore eliminating my chances with her and going into a state of depression for a while.2-Continue talking and getting to know her better and hope she feels ready a little later. If not, I'll be even more heart broken.3-Continue talking a bit. It's much harder to forget (going into depression for much longer), but I retain a slim chance with her.The other side to this is that if I had someone else to turn to, I would. But I don't, so it's really hard to look at this with the "fish in the sea" analogy. She is very special to me.Vote on an option, or suggest something else. What do you advise.
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reader, anonymous, writes (31 January 2010): You seem like a nice guy, and unlike most others this girl is being very straight with you. She told you alot of her relationships have ended badly, maybe she's scared? She doesn't want to get involved incase things between you would be the same. I don't think it's that she doesn't like you. You need to show her that she is as special as you make her out to be, that she means alot to you. Every girl likes knowing they mean something to someone. Maybe what you need to do is be there for her, show you care. If that was me i'd realise I had someone special. You never know, she might move on quicker than you think.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 January 2010): Hmm difficult one, I dont think you should give up completely as she hasnt said there is no chance at all the two of you could become more than friends. But here's another option, turn up the heal a little.
Hows this... She knows you like her and want to be with her... so imagine if you started giving other girls attention that you used to give her, she's more than likely to get jealous and wonder why you stopped doing it to her... its the old method of that key word..ATTRACTION.
Dont completely ignore this girl, but also dont make it blatent that your pretty desperate to be with her. Im pretty sure this method would work a hell of a lot better than the other's my friend. Good luck.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (30 January 2010):
Go with the second.
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A
male
reader, redsox29 +, writes (30 January 2010):
You have to decide what you feel is the best for you. You don't want to have any regrets so you need to follow your heart. But you have to ready yourself for all options.
Why have all her relationships ended badly? Is it always her doing?
And, dude, you're young yet. I know she is special to you and that's great, but you are going to meet many many many more women who will be very special to you.
Speaking from experience, I would keep chatting with the girl but I'd take some time to hang out with your buddies and not just focus on her. You may find someone else in the mean time. Also, I wouldn't bring up the "dating" thing, just enjoy the friend part and see where it goes and if you meet someone else that you dig, hang out with them.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (30 January 2010): go with the second one. its funny. i have been working a girl my self for the last 6 months. this girl is byfar the most attractive girl i have ever met. i finaly am now going to go pick her up in a few mins. 6 months my friend is how long i have been waiting, watching her date other guys and get dumped,and then talkin to her to chear her up. if you want this girl take it slow. dont over do it. dont hint at it for a while. just be good friends and throw some very very light hints in every now and then (every few days or weeks) eventualy she will fall on her face for you. give it a shot! it worked for me, Im going to go pick up the girl of beyond my dreams right now! good luck
Dustin,
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