A
female
age
30-35,
*iany2009
writes:ok so as you can see rom my other posts I have had a really hard relationship with my boyfriend from the beginning, I will just give you a brief run down. We met in march 2009, he cheated on me within 2 weeks with his ex, then in july I feel pregnant and miscarried and he left me. we got back together in september and I fell pregnant again in the january, everything was then perfect until i was 40 weeks pregnant and my best friend found him on a dating site. then I found out he was having cyber sex with lots of girls and that he had met one girl from the dating site but nothing happend.Yesterday through a fake account he made for himself at the time he was cheating, I messaged another girl that I found and now found out he was having an affair for a month with her sleeping with her everynight while I was pregnant. hes 22 and im 21 and he says that it was because at the time i wasn't giving him enough sex, and he felt like i didnt want to be with him or and i did satisfy his needs and he was scared of growing up and being a dad. My problem is this, when I found out about the other girl we talked and I forgave becuase I wanted to have family and not bring my son into a broken home. he swore to me that he would change and that he loves me more than anything, but now I find this out although he still did this before he "changed" i just dont know how i could ever move forward from this and forgive him for holding such a massive lie back. he says he was scared to tell me as he knew it would be over and I would leave him. and i think thats what i have to do but deep down i dont want to, I want him and I just want to be happy. im in bits, the only thing thats keeping me going is my wonderful son, i just felt like he was the one, he made me so happy I couldn't of felt happier. we enjoyed the same things, always laughed and joked i felt he was soulmate now i feel lost and scared and alone and all i want is to cuddle him and him to tell me everything will be ok. sounds so stupid but I feel I need him now
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affair, best friend, cheated on me, got back together, his ex, soulmate, want to be happy Reply to this Question
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female
reader, siany2009 +, writes (17 November 2010):
siany2009 is verified as being by the original poster of the questiongod life is hard! i spent years being a rebel and now all i wanted was to be happy and its all been taken from me i dont know if I would ever be better off without him hes in the army and my son will never see him if were seperated
A
female
reader, eyeswideopen  +, writes (17 November 2010):
 You have to ask yourself if you are better off with him or if you are better off without him. Think hard and remember you are thinking for both yourself and your son. Your BF will most likely cheat on you over and over again, can you live with that? When the going got tough, he got going, can you live with the fact that he has run out on you before? You really need to sit down and have a really long think.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (17 November 2010):
No it's not your fault. And how can a man who deserts you when you have a miscarriage, cheats on you several times, and lie have a heart of gold? He doesn't. He isn't worthy of you. The more you stay, the more likely it is that your son will come to resent all of this. Children aren't stupid, and at some point he will be old enough to work out that his father is a two bit cheap. But he's not worthy of you at all, and I think you are at times playing blind in the hope he will change. He won't. He will continue to make a mockery of you and your son whilst you let him. You might forgive. Your son one day won't.
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A
female
reader, siany2009 +, writes (17 November 2010):
siany2009 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI just wish I could stop loving him I know that what I have said paint him out to be so bad but hes not all bad he has a heart of gold would do anything for me and I know he loves me and our son im not perfect either Im annoying I talk to much and worry all the time and when he cheated when I was pregnant although we had sex it wasn't good it was like we were doing it for the sake of it so maybe its my fault to
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (17 November 2010):
Your son is from a broken home anyway. His father is a cheat, and a man who deserted you when you miscarried. The man is dreadful. He cheated, you stayed together, you miscarried (for which I am very sorry), he left you. He came back, he cheated again, you got pregnant, now he's cheating again. And, to top it off, he's complaining about you not meeting his needs!
Your son is from a broken home. The difference is you can choose to be strong for yourself and your son, or you can hang around this guy. Because what you do not want is your son to find the truth out one day, and blame you for not having left. To put your son first, you have to do the right thing for HIM AND YOU. Not just HIM, or your boyfriend. And what is right here is that you and him are away from this dreadful man. He's a cheat, a liar and deserted you once when you most needed him. He will do it again.
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A
male
reader, Jmtmj  +, writes (17 November 2010):
 Why on earth you'd want to be with him still is beyond me...
Stay with this man and things may be fine for a while, but it'll inevitably become a broken home... At least by leaving him you'll have a chance at meeting someone who you might actually have a promising future with and a stable home for your son.
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