A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I keep getting the urge to cheat. I was his first, but I've had 7 other people over the space of 3 years. I know he loves me and it would kill me to break his heart, but sometimes we just argue and argue and I feel like we're going nowhere. I get paranoid that he's like me, thinks about other people, finds other people attractive, it scares me because I feel like such a rubbish girlfriend. I wouldn't cheat on him, but the thrill of thinking about it....He gets paranoid when I talk to other guys without him being there, and I'm the same, probably worse.I don't know wether I like the feeling of being with him, or like the feeling of him being no-one else's. I want to stay with him, but I just want us to be more exciting!It's all very complicated :( Reply to this Question
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male
reader, MMMaM  +, writes (20 June 2009):
I started to tell you that you need to leave him, but then I realized that I'm in a similar situation with my wife. I keep myself from doing anything by reminding myself of what else is at stake other than our marriage (our child, the trust issues, my parents finding out, children that we know, etc).
A
male
reader, holikdad +, writes (17 June 2009):
Why is it that women think they're the only woman that their BF/Husband is attracted to???
Are you trying to say that there are no other guy's that you're attracted to?
Stop fighting life is to short. If you don't love him anymore then do the honorable thing and break up with him before you start looking elsewhere.
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A
female
reader, betty_black +, writes (17 June 2009):
 Catch 22 situation. You dont wanna be with him but dont want him to be with anyone else. So in a way you do want to be with him just to keep him from anyone else, probably because your his first and you want to remain his only for your own peace of mind. Your in quite a destructive relationship. You want other men, and your paranoid hes thinking the same. If i were you, i'd write down the positives and negatives of being with him, i know it sounds corny but trust me it bloody works! and think long and hard about the situation. Maybe take a break from each other and if you miss him you'll know. There has to be something missing if youre thinking about other men! Good luck.
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