A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Please excuse the graphic details!!I have never had a "G-spot" orgasm. Only ever clitoral orgasms. My boyfriend of two years says he really wants me to have one. I think he misses it and feels he can't satisfy me sexually. But I can only really give myself clitoral orgasm. We even bought a vibrator so I can practise! But I have a lot of difficulty putting it inside me. And I do not find it comfortable. My boyfriend is about 9 inches at full size and he sometimes has difficulty getting his penis in at first, but fine and confortable for me when in. He says I'm extremely tight. I would like to be able to orgasm vaginally, for both of us! I'm open to pretty much anything as I'm not a prude at all!I've always had a niggling concern that this orgasm thing is in my head. I see a therapist because I have trust issues. I also don't seem to allow myself to enjoy happiness because I am worried something bad will happen. I don't think this therapist is too comfortable talking about sex so I'd rather not bring it up with her. I've never really experienced much sexual physical pleasure. My current boyfriend has by far given me the most. So I'd love to return the favour!!
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male
reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (2 January 2014):
 No big deal. There is way too much stress in our lives than to have to worry about how best to have an orgasm. Pity the ones that can't have one at all. The vibrator should do the trick if not try harder some other way. Don't stress out over it,.
A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (1 January 2014):
 YouWish put it so simply..
****How many guys could orgasm from touching his scrotum ALONE? Exactly.***
Your BF is putting pressure on you to achieve something that MAY not be possible for you. Like mentioned MOST women (75+%) DO NOT have orgasms from penetration ALONE.
And using a dildo that you do not find comfortable (my guess is your BF things BIGGER will do it? well honey, HE is wrong. Bigger would most likely be worse. Like another auntie mentioned you NEED a bent or curved one and since the Supposed G-spot is only 2-3 inches in - it doesn't have to be long at ALL (or with big girth). It just needs to tickle the "right" spot which IS the BACKSIDE of the clitoris!
Stop trying to live up to the porn fantasy that insertion is the ULTIMATE way for a women to orgasm. It's not.
And maybe YOU do need to "fly solo" (as in masturbation) to figure out what makes you tick.
You therapist seems useless if she can't handle a talk about sex, maybe you need to consider looking for a new one.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 January 2014): You say your boyfriend feels like he cannot satisfy you sexually. Has he actually asked you whether you are satisfied or indeed is it obvious one way or another in an unspoken way. Surely this is about how you feel. To me it sounds like an awful lot of pressure (excuse the pun) to be putting you under - which in itself will not help. I have never concerned myself with whether or not my g-spot is involved I just know that having an orgasm is great when it happens and just go with my instincts. Does it really have to be so scientific?
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A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (1 January 2014):
 A g-spot orgasm is, quite simply, to stimulate the clitoris indirectly from inside the vagina. Some can, some can't.
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A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (31 December 2013):
 First Freud told women they were broken if they didn't have vaginal ones, not Cosmo tells women they are broken if they can't have G spot ones.
ALL orgasms are clitoral, it's just a matter of where it's stimulated from. Some women enjoy the sensation of G spot stimulation, some do not, but a 100% G spot orgasm is about as possible as a scrotum orgasm for men.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (31 December 2013):
 I think this whole G-SPOT orgasm idea is a boatload of crap.
all the g-spot is doing is rubbing your clit internally.
it's like giving a guy a prostate massage via his anus.
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (31 December 2013):
 I can't BEGIN to tell you how many hours I have spent searching for my G/F's "G-spot".... apparently, without success.....
HOWEVER, just about every night, when we retire, she sez to me: "Hey, I'm feeling a little randy. Would you care to spend a few minutes searching some more for my "G-spot"????? .... and, you KNOW where THAT leads!!!!
(Try that with YOUR boy!!!!!).....
Good luck...
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A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (31 December 2013):
First of all, you're in the majority because up to 75% of women don't have penetrative orgasms. G-spot orgasms stimulate the CLITORIS from inside the vagina, so it's not how deep you go, it's whether or not you have the right angle and enough pressure and stimulation.
A G-spot vibrator is hooked and often has a second "branch" for simultaneous clitoral stimulation. Lelo, Adam and Eve, and EdenFantasy have good options, but you want CURVED in order to produce that pressure. Most guys' penises are NOT curved. It's not about how deep it goes! The G-spot is only a couple of inches in.
Also, have you "flown solo", so to speak? The key to good partner sex is your ability to know your own body.
Some women simply do not have a G-spot, which is fine! The vagina has very few of its own orgasmic nerve endings. For a guy, it's the equivalent of only stimulating his scrotum and not touching his shaft at all. How many guys could orgasm from touching his scrotum ALONE? Exactly.
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A
male
reader, M Proops +, writes (31 December 2013):
Most women can't orgasm through intercourse only without some form of clitoral stimulation.It's highly dedatable if the G-spot exists anyway.Half of so called experts say it does the other half say it does't.Maybe it's your boyfriend's technique with initial penetration difficulty.If you're fully lubricated then it should not be problematic.Fully lubricated means fully sexually aroused.
Just like a man fully sexually aroused means a hard erection.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 December 2013): The jury is actually still out on whether the G-spot really exists. Most biologists and anatomists agree that it doesn't.
I have never had a G-spot orgasm and neither has any other woman I know. And it doesn't worry me.
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A
male
reader, BrownWolf  +, writes (31 December 2013):
Well you said the truth..."I've always had a niggling concern that this orgasm thing is in my head." Enjoyment of sex does come from your mind. If your mind is distracted by trust issues or trying to have G-spot orgasm, you are missing out on the real thing.
You said you are open to anything??? Try this...Just enjoy sex. No thoughts of anything else. Leave the vibrator alone...just dive into the pleasure of sex. The more turned on your are mentally, the better your chances of ahave a G-spot orgasm. Because the more turn on your are, the more sensitive things are down there :)
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A
female
reader, Lieutenant +, writes (31 December 2013):
If you're paying your therapist money, they have the responsibility to listen to ANYTHING that you want to talk about; even if you murdered someone in the past. If she is incredibly uncomfortable with her patients talking about sex, it's as easy as referring you to another colleague of hers who would not mind.
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