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I have just found out that my boyfriend of 3 years kissed a guy before we met and I don't know how to take this...

Tagged as: Dating, Pregnancy, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (26 February 2008) 6 Answers - (Newest, 5 March 2008)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, anonymous writes:

I have just found out that my boyfriend of 3 years kissed a guy before we met but I have just discovered that he is on a swingers site and his profile is very detailed about him wanting a threesome and he wants to be in the middle. It also said he's seeking both sexes. As I have never doubted his sexuality before I am very surprised and I have recently found out I am pregnant too! I really don't know what to think or do about this. Can you help? Thanks x

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A male reader, 17Irish17 United States +, writes (5 March 2008):

It might be pretty strong to label him as "Gay". For what ever reason a lot of men like to watch and/or participate in a 3 some with their significant other. Does that make her a lesbian?

He may be bisexual, and is emaressed or afraid to discuss that side of his sexuality with you. He probably loves you, but also likes to par take in sex with males.

You have to discuss it with him. Then the ball is in your court. Can you accept this or do you move on?

Good luck

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A female reader, love-him United Kingdom +, writes (28 February 2008):

love-him agony auntHEY!!

If he is still ACTIVELY on the swingers website then talk to him, there is a chance he made this account and forgot about it.. (check for the last active bit on his profile if there is one)

GOOD LUCK!! Feel free to mail me at any time x x

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A female reader, xapathyxrebornx United Kingdom +, writes (26 February 2008):

xapathyxrebornx agony auntI think you need to sit down and talk to him, dont be annoyed at his past. think of your future, tell him what you are adn not comfortable with and TALK x

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (26 February 2008):

Sounds like he is GAY to me. I don't agree with the posters who state that you need to love him more and talk with him. This man, if he still has a profile on a website now after 3 years and has stated he is looking for both sexes....is indeed gay! You can call it bi-sexual, gay, metro sexual, or whatever you choose to, but this dude is gay and YOU should take all necessary precautions with him.

Keep this in mind.....he will not change this behavior, but will only hide it better from you the next time.

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A male reader, leonard j. Douglas  +, writes (26 February 2008):

If he kissed a guy before you two met and didn't turn into a frog, Gee! You are lucky. As for a threesome,it makes for a sick relationship before marriage and as a rule will end it PDQ. Perhaps he is watching too much Porn.

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A female reader, Aylarsh United States +, writes (26 February 2008):

Aylarsh agony auntYou two have been together for 3 years and you love each other. I wouldn't be mad at him at all or anything, it was his choice to do this and it's before you met so it's not like he's cheating on you. He could be doing worse. He needs you now and you should probably confront him. I agree that he should shape up since he wants a threesome. tell him how you feel and that you are pregnant with his child. Just sit him down at an appropriate time and very calmly talk to him in a strong firm but soft voice.

Good luck and if you have any questions or anything then please message me! Good luck love!!

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