A
male
age
36-40,
*olidus
writes:My buddy recently got a new roommate, who just happens to be a really sexy, intelligent, funny girl, who does awesome shit like make pancakes and watches all my favorite movies. It's very hard not to be attracted to her. He went out and left us alone together for the first time tonight. We hung out, watched one of our favorite shows, and laughed for a few hours. Which only made me like her more. Even though I'm super attracted to her and we get along really well, I constantly remind myself not to hit on her. I mean, what if I hit on her and things go south? She's not some girl at a bar, I'm at their place ALL the time so I'm going to have to see her fairly often. What do you guys suggest I do or maybe don't do in this case?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (23 October 2013): I think if you are really attracted to her, stay good friends and if your buddy leaves her, go for it...It May Be The Love Of Your Life!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 October 2013): Continue enjoying her company in the "friend-zone."
If she really likes you, you'll grow on her. Then she'll be given room to be direct and show more interest. You'll save face; if you're not considered just an another admirer with his tongue hanging out. You'll also find out if your best friend is up to the same game. Unless he's gay.
Getting exited over the fact she's pretty, intelligent, and friendly (not to mention conveniently accessible) is sort of opportunistic. It sounds like a juvenile crush. She may not even see you as anything more than a nice guy, and simply being hospitable to a guest.
Her looks and personality is largely the reason she was chosen to be your bud's roommate, dude. Honor the "Guy Code." Keep hands above the table.
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A
male
reader, Solidus +, writes (22 October 2013):
Solidus is verified as being by the original poster of the question You've all made some very valid points, I think I'm going to take things slow and see what develops. She's definitely the kind of girl I'd want to have a relationship with and not just a fwb thing. Unrelated side note, my friend is dating her good friend which is how they know each other haha
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A
male
reader, CMMP +, writes (22 October 2013):
Take things slow, that's what I'd suggest. That way you can always be evaluating things to make sure you guys are good for each other.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (22 October 2013):
 have you asked your friend how he feels about it?
maybe he left you alone with her for a reason?
yes if you date her and it does not work out, then it could be awkward when you visit your friend.
and if you date here and she continues to live there it could impact on your friendship in a not so positive way...
I'd talk to your friend about it and then if he's ok with it... see what happens.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 October 2013): I think if you like her in the sense that you want to date her and see if a relationship will develop then yes you should definitely go for it. However if you're only looking for a casual/fwb type arrangement then I wouldn't. It's worth the risk if you think it might lead somewhere but not for a bit of fun - casual arrangements are often messy at the best of times. Hope this helps :)
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A
female
reader, desiree075  +, writes (22 October 2013):
Life is too short to always do the appropriate thing. I say go for it!
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