A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: I have a problem. my husband had a relationship with his baby mom behind my back for some time. Now they have two kids. but before they had kids all three of us had threesomes (they were having sex before we all slept together). I miss having them. We moved out of state but I have been thinking about telling the other female to move down here because of the children and because I still want her in my sex life. Mind you, I hate her and I have told her very hurtful things becuase she was sleeping with my husband for years with hopes that he would leave me. But I am very confused about this. I don;t like her but maybe it is becuase I may love her and want her to be with the both of us now. I still get jealous if they were to be together without me. If so what should I tell her because I think she hates me because I told her off real bad. And she is the type of girl that doesn't care about anyone else but herself. Not to sure what to do?
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jealous, moved out, sex life, threesome Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Guitarboy  +, writes (9 October 2009):
 So tell us again why you'd want to have a threesome with the same woman you feel jealous over? You are just giving them a green light to continuing having an intimate relationship and watching it, no helping it unfold That sounds sadistic to me. Do you like pain? Maybe on some level you think if you invite her, he'll be less likely to sneak around to see her behind your back. Maybe you feel like that is a form of control. Because at least you'll be watching what happens, and being part of it, rather than being left out. But I think that's a dangerous game and that's probably why they've been fooling around behind your back to begin with -- Usually threesomes violate some form of trust between the two people who are actually together. Now that you've moved away from this woman, I think you should leave things alone and look for a good counselor instead. I think there may be some issues you should explore within yourself so you can allow yourself to have a happy marriage without the outside (sexual) help. Best of luck.
A
female
reader, Jayney Y  +, writes (9 October 2009):
 Errr, you need an answer to this? I don't know about the other Aunts, but I can't think of any good reason why you would voluntarily invite someone you 'hate' to be a huge part of your life. Your whole scenario sounds really twisted and seriously psychologically unhealthy for everyone concerned, including the kids. Maybe you should consider the long-term effects on them of living amongst hatred.
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