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male
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anonymous
writes: I am an Asian male in my mid twenties.On one of my jobs, I had to live for almost one year out of my home. During that period, I was with a girl. We used to go out most of the time, but not as a couple. After more than a couple of months like this, I could tell what she had on her mind.But I had to return due to my job. The last day I had to leave that place, I was feeling very bad. I could tell she was also not feeling that good.It has been more than 6-7 months and I have not seen her. We used to send emails regularly. Now-a-days she doesn't reply. Sometimes, after weeks she replies to my messages.When I look at other girls, I do get attracted, but when I think of "the girl" as my life time partner. I imagine getting along together, raising a family. But the reality is I live exactly 200 km away from her.plz help
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female
reader, ASK SAMI +, writes (20 September 2005):
 Try putting yourself in her shoes for the moment. This woman has had a man that she likes move far away from her, and is feeling the same hurt and loss that you are. She may think that there is no chance that you will see eachother again, and may be feeling lost and confused with the fact that you have left her, out of no fault of your own. As you might know, girls are known to get very attatched when with someone they like or love, so it will be harder for her to realise that you are indeed a large distance away from her. Just because you have not talked with her for sometime, does not mean that she has deliberatly forgot, or stopped caring about you. I expect she is just as keen as you are to talk and she probably thinks about you most of the time. Try writing to her, as this tends to be more effective than e-mails, and she will see that you too are thinking about her.
Whatever you do, donot give up on her, as this may seem like a stupid idea if indeed she does care for you, and tries to contact you. She will be very humiliated if she contacts you and you are already in a firm relationship. But, also, donot put your life on hold if she doesnt't contact you after a few letters, as this will spoil your love life and relationships with other girls.
Good luck.
A
reader, aunt april  +, writes (20 September 2005):
its obvious you love this girl and if you do then contact her thinking about her all the time is not doing you any good and im sure she will be pleased to hear from you if anything contacting her will stop you from driving your self crazy.
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A
reader, wwww.datinghaven.com +, writes (20 September 2005):
Cant you talk daily via the phone? Or via Instant Messenger client like MSN?
To me it sounds like she has been occupied by someone else i.e. another guy, she has feelings for u still thats why she does reply...im sorry to bring that up but i think you need to know that.
Now an handsome guy like yourself cant find it hard to find another girl?!(Rhetorical) Theres no reason why you cant date! But its worth still contacting "the girl" because true love (it seems to me to be) is worth fighting for!
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