A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:hi everyone, just want to ask some advice or help regarding my own issue. i had my first sexual experience with my boyfriend.At first it was uncomfortable but eventually i became relaxed.I didn't bleed nor feel the pain as they say for the first timer it was so painful.we were fooling before until we finally did it. after that he said i was a little looser and he questioned me about whether i already had experienced sex before. as i know my self and my own body there were no one but him, i think he doesn't believe me. i also ask my self why it happened I'm really confused.thanks. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Corantien  +, writes (26 December 2012):
I didn't bleed, nor did I feel any pain. He's propably insecure and he should be glad you weren't in pain. Would he rather had his first time with you while you were crying and painting the sheets completely red? I don't think so... You maybe took your own virginity (you would still be a virgin, but your hymnen could be more flexible or a bit ripped by this) while practising sports or masturbating or some girls just don't have any troubles the first time.
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (17 December 2012):
 I agree with KC_100
I didn't bleed the first time (although I have at other times) and it didn't hurt the first time (although it has at other times)
you say you think he doesn't believe you... why is that? did he say something?
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A
female
reader, k_c100  +, writes (17 December 2012):
 Everyone's vaginas are different shapes and sizes, so it is easily possible that yours is naturally a little different to what he has experienced before. And when you fool around obviously you will be naturally lubricated, and that helps to make it more comfortable for you (hence no pain) and it makes it easier for him to enter you.
He is being really silly here, I dont think he knows much about sex or the female body and he needs some sex education!
1. 1st times are not always painful, as I said before if you are well lubricated from fooling around it will have been more comfortable for you and that is why you didnt experience pain.
2. Bleeding doesnt always happen - hymens are easily broken and it sounds like yours had been broken before hence why you didnt bleed. Hymens can break in childhood without you knowing it, things like horse riding, gymnastics and other sports can break the hymen naturally without you knowing. Tampons can break the hymen too. And if you have fooled around in the past (i.e. if he has put his fingers inside your vagina before) then the hymen could have broken then. So there are many occasions when yours could have broken without having sex, meaning you are still a virgin just without your hymen!
3. Vaginas are different sizes are wont feel the same for men, one vagina will differ to another. So if your boyfriend has had sex before with a virgin then it is perfectly normal for you to feel different to whoever he has slept with.
Explain all of this to him and hopefully he will understand, as long as you know in yourself that this was your first time that's all that maters.
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A
female
reader, Red591 +, writes (17 December 2012):
 What a friggin jerk. Maybe you feel looser cause he has a small D!ck. If he doesn't believe you than he is insecure and that is his problem and insecurity will cause him problems his whole life but it doesn't have to cause you problems. Next time he asks if it was really your first time, I would respond with "well...there was that football team last week" and flip him off ha ha ha ha
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