A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I had an abortion two weeks ago, and Im feeling so alone. I got pregnant by this boy I know, and when I told him all he said was get rid of it and I didn't hear off him after (still haven't to this day as he blocked me on Facebook and blocked my number ). Although I had my friends to help me through it, they are nowhere to be seen now, I understand they have there own lives and admit I do put on a brave face and attitutde when I'm around them. I just want to find someone that loves me and is there for me, I understand I got my friends but want to find someone and have my own life too and not always rely on them. I do have boys which I met up with and go out to places with but all u see them as is friends. I want to find someone in where we have the same feelings and we both want to be there for each other. I dont know if it's because what iv been though or still going through or if it's woken me up abit and made me realise I do want more. I understand this boy isnt going to just walk in my life tomorrow, and i know i probley will get hurt looking for this person (im use to getting hurt) but I'm just asking if anyone got any suggestions in where I can stop myself feeling lonley, upset and alone all the time???
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 August 2012): Aw in so sorry do your family know about this you really need them and friends in your life right nowut makes md fixk that boys/men can do this to us women! Leave him well alone he will regret his actions one day the way you got to think about it is you have gotten away from him and there will be a time when he does this to someone else again, please don't feel your on your own you made the right choice for you give it time it will all heal your only young there is someone out there for everyone including you x
A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (28 August 2012):
Hi.
First of all, you're not alone. At all. There are other people who have been through this, and have felt the way you do. I think you're right, in that you've been through something that has suddenly made you look at your life, and decide that you want more, or want things to change.
However, I also think that there is a good chance you're feeling this way because you're not dealing with what has happened to you, rather than just having 'woken up'. You also appear to be suffering a bit with low self esteem (you've been hurt a lot?), and that might also be influencing you.
I would strongly urge you to seek counselling, before you seek that special guy. I think you need to come to terms with what has happened to you, and then look for someone to be with, or the cycle of hurt will just continue.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 August 2012): I wish I could give you an easy way out of these dreadful feelings, but I don't have any. I'm looking for ways to deal with loneliness and emptiness myself and so far the only moments I stopped feeling that way was when I had feelings for a guy who seemed to return them. Too bad none of those semi-relationships ever worked out.
You could try and widen your social net and make more friends, this way you'd have more people to rely on instead...but I know it's not the same thing. It could be that your abortion made you realize how lonely you actually are, also considering how that jerk of a guy treated you, maybe he was just a filler for your loneliness and now that he's shown his true colors you feel even worse.
I don't have a solution, but I wanted to let you know you're not the only one feeling this way. I hope we'll be okay.
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A
female
reader, agonyauntsanonymous  +, writes (28 August 2012):
I went through a similar situation with an ex bf. He used me and was selfish through the relationship, but i was so blind. I found out i was preg on my 20th birthday, he told me if i got rid of it it would basically solve our problems, but i wanted to give it up for adoption. I ended up going through with the abortion, pill form and it was horrible. After i felt so depressed and alone. He didnt even care and while i was going through the abortion itself he kept telling me to shut up because i kept having to run to the bathroom. We broke up 2wks later and he came and got his things. It was difficult. But i learned that post abortion depression is common, even though i hadnt heard about it. There are groups that meet up and help you through it, support groups. You should try that. Try 2 find a hobby you enjoy also and get involved in that. Dont jump into a relationship until you are fine with being alone and on your own. Make peace with yourself frist. You will also be able to meet new ppl at the support group
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