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I give him oral 24/7, but NEVER has gotten it in return, am I being selfish?

Tagged as: Sex, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (14 May 2011) 16 Answers - (Newest, 2 July 2011)
A female United States age 30-35, *ative92 writes:

Hello, I am a 18 year old female and i am mixed. I am native american and black. I been with my boyfriend for a year in a half and i have done everything to please him. I even pay for every single damn thing. I wait for him all the damn time everywhere we go. He sould be waiting on me! = [. Which never happens, I have never even in my life given a blow job untill i felt so much passion towards him. i mean i am perfect i am i perfectly tight down there 24/7. He has never even attempted to eat me out, not even once, i never smell down there, i am ALWAYS FRESH, never smelted fishy or any damn thing, he always ask me "baby can you suck on jimmy for me please boo," i dont even hesitate to say no...i am sexually frustrated man all it is i suck him off then we go at it for a couple of hours then were done. I AM SEXUALLY FRUSTRATED!!!!!! I am faithful to him, two months into our relationship i caught him talking to three other bitches behind my back all of them frm Facebook. Then when were on the phone he is always quit i asked him "are you going to talk or what?", he says "yeah", contiues to be quit. I am so fucking irrated with his ass. Please help me out on this. No rude comments plz.

View related questions: blow-job, facebook, sexually frustrated

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A reader, anonymous, writes (2 July 2011):

Yes, you need to move on. Not only is he holding back affection and pleasure to you but he's hedging his bet towards getting with someone else. And the irony of that is they new girlfriend may get oral because SHE WILL DEMAND it. But that is not ideal either.

A good relationship is were each person gives and receives freely. The man may not be crazy about oral sex all the time and vice versa but you do it to please the other person. And I know for me I get a certain level of pleasure from that. But moreover I would not be with a man who refused to give me oral affection. This guy is selfish!

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A female reader, So_Very_Confused United States +, writes (20 May 2011):

So_Very_Confused agony aunthave you told HIM these issues?

if not you need to tell HIM...

if he knows and does not care... stop wasting your time and get on with your life withOUT him.

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A female reader, beatuiful plump United States +, writes (17 May 2011):

Girl it is time now to dump this zero and find someone who

truly loves you for who you are and not what you can give them.

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A female reader, Abella United States +, writes (15 May 2011):

Abella agony auntno wonder you are completely and totally at your wits end with this guy.

He has not been treating you as his lady. If he wants your attention he needs to be reciprocating too.

This relationship is too unequal for words.

He needs to be spoiling you.

He needs to be doing the hard work to show his love and appreciation. If he is not willing to do that then whatever is he there for. Because his actions are lacking in every respect.

Put a much higher value on yourself.

This man will destroy your respect and your self esteem. That is a terrible price to pay just for a bit of attention from this guy.

Look at his actions. They hardly recommend him as the man you should be with. Don't waste another minute on him.

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A female reader, angelDlite United Kingdom +, writes (15 May 2011):

angelDlite agony auntthis relationship sounds totally unequal, not only in terms of the oral sex but in EVERY way! you sound now to be be really angry about how he is making you feel. there are plenty of other men in the world, so do you feel compelled to waste even more of your time with this one while all the other opportunities pass you by??

i would suggest you make an honest list of all his good points and all his bad ones. decide from that if you want to be with him of not. the worst thing for me is that you said he can't even be bothered talking to you when you call. that says a lot

x

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A female reader, Madalo 1 Malawi +, writes (15 May 2011):

Talk to him about all your concerns. If he doesnt change, off you go!

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A male reader, Problem.helper United States +, writes (14 May 2011):

Problem.helper agony auntOk just stop doing him any favors(bj,waiting for him all the time )

or break up with him

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (14 May 2011):

Let him go.

You will never be enough for him. He takes all you give and is looking for more elsewhere. He's selfish. You deserve so much better. He's playing mind games with you. He knows you know you are perfect. He's playing on that. By not giving you what you deserve (love, affection, attention, oral etc.), he's makin you feel like he's seeing something about you that isn't perfect.

Sweetie, you are trying to please a man who is bringing you down because you are a perfectionist. A woman, especially one who strives to Perfection, like yourself, deserves to be partnered with a true man...one who understands, respects, compliments, and completes her. Your man is still a boy. Dump him while you still have your self respect.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (14 May 2011):

I was like that with my ex GF, she never reciprocated oral. Leave this guy. He is very immature, arguably just using you, and he has absolutely no respect. Your background sounds truly interesting and Im sure plenty of guys would wanna get to know you as thats a nice ice breaker anyway. Yeah by tolerating this youre saying to him its okay. Have you asked him why he doesnt go down? lol personally i build a taliban camp down there all day ;)... i dont know how he could be disinterested in an attractive woman who treats him like a king. You definitely deserve a two way street relationship. Good luck.

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A female reader, lovebird1 Germany +, writes (14 May 2011):

I think you already know in your heart that this guy isn't good for you, doesn't deserve you, and that it's time for you to leave. This is not a minor sexual problem, it's about fairness and devotion and he obviously doesn't love you as much or care as much.

Get yourself a grown up man who'll treat you like he should. You're a generous, loving person. You can make someone happy who'll love you back in return.

You won't change such a selfish guy in a million years. It's not even worth trying. So have the courage to end this.

Wish you all the best with a new guy :)

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A female reader, Tisha-1 United States +, writes (14 May 2011):

Tisha-1 agony auntAs long as you allow yourself to be his doormat, he will wipe his shoes on you. The reason he does it is because you stick around and tolerate it, in fact you reward him by giving him blow jobs and paying for everything. He thinks you're fine with things just the way you are. If you weren't, you would be gone.

I'm sorry to report this to you but your man does not respect you.

Don't tolerate any of the nonsense he's gotten up to and stop trying to win his love so desperately with bjs and cash. You can't change him, you can only change how you react to him.

It's a pretty basic life lesson you are learning the hard way. Good luck.

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A male reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (14 May 2011):

olderthandirt agony auntAny man that won't go down on his lover is wierd enough to run from. He sounds sexually imature at best which could lead to long lonely nights for you at worse. I'd take a hike and go find a real lover.

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A female reader, lacrymosa_652 United Kingdom +, writes (14 May 2011):

lacrymosa_652 agony auntIf you're not happy being with him, then don't be with him. Some people are happy to give without expecting anything in return, but if you feel as if things should be 50:50 [which is totally fair] and he just takes and does not give, then it doesn't seem as if you both are compatible, sexually or otherwise. Leave this relationship and find someone who you agree with better - who will give you oral sex and will offer to pay more often.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (14 May 2011):

Honeypie agony auntMaybe, honey, it's time to find a man who truly appreciate you? To me it seems like you are his doormat not his GF. And you.. let him.

Kick his dumbass to the curb.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (14 May 2011):

This guy is 100% in this relationship for himself. Dump him and go find a guy who cares about YOUR NEEDS and is a giver NOT a TAKER!~

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A female reader, auntyR United Kingdom +, writes (14 May 2011):

simple honey...stop giving him pleasure if your not getting anything back

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