A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:I have been married for 5 years now but i feel lonely and unloved my husband cant get an erection in the first two years he did try to get help with ths from the doctor but has given up on this he did try and fullfill me in other ways but i was left deflated so we dont even do that any more i feel because of not getting fullfillment in the bedroom we have grown apart but i feel lonely unloved so i have been texting this other guy in another country we send sexy loving text to each other so this makes me feel good and wanted as this guy has said he loves me i know its wrong but i cant stop myself doing this i am so confused of what to do i feel sorry for my husband and he tells me he will be dead in 6 weeksif i leave him but i know i cant go on like this i just dont know what to do
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erection, text, unloved Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 April 2010): If sexless ness is issue Most wives around the world will be Divorced tomorrow.
So i do not give too much importance to reason cited.
My feeling is that you are trying to justify to ur conscience, who is stoping you or questioning you for doing the cheating to your respected husband.
so forget that and be true to yourself than asking questions here and there. your heart and conscience is best mirror of what you need to do.
u will find the right answer yourself.
A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (5 April 2010):
 A sexless marriage is not really a marriage and you can't be blamed for missing physical intimacy and wanting to leave. But before that, make sure you two have done anything possible to solve his sexual problems. You say that he seeked help from his doctor in the first two years. What kind of doctor ? Has it al least been found out whether it is a physical problem (circulation, diabetes, hormones, etc.etc. ) or a psychological one ? Did he see a shrink ? How was your husband 's sex life before you, did he have this problem with other women or just with you ?Is he severely depressed, a heavy drinker, a heavy smoker ( believe it or not, even cigarette smoke may cause erection difficulties )? Did he ever tried Viagra or Cialis ? As you see, there's tons of things you could and should look into before deciding the problem can't be solved....
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A
male
reader, Honest Answer  +, writes (5 April 2010):
 Your long distant relationship (LDR) has an unfair advantage over your husband. All your LDR has to do is let you know what you want to hear. And since he is courting you, there is no doubt what he is saying to win your affection. Your husband on the other hand has a real life relationship with you. Like all marriages, there are good times and there are bad times.
From what you describe, other than your sex life (and I know this is important) your marriage is good. There is help. Tell you husband how important this is to you and ask him to see a doctor. There are pills (viagra) and even surgical solutions.
I just have a feeling that once you have sex with your LDR, you will finally see that your husband has more to offer.
Good Luck!
Jeff
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A
female
reader, mystiquek +, writes (5 April 2010):
 I'm sorry about the problems you are having in your marriage, it cannot be easy when you are not sexually fulfilled. I was in a marriage like that, and it is very devastating! With that said, I also understand how having an internet romance makes you feel happy, alive, ect...BUT..surely you realize that it is a fantasy?? You have never met this man..and really have no clue what he is like, right? And that's part of the excitement and thrill about internet romances...you only see and hear the GOOD about that person. Its thrilling, in your case forbidden..and it makes you happy. But having never met the man...its also NOT REAL. I realize its taking you away from your reality, but you have to look ahead. Where do you really think this romance is going to go?? What if the guy is a liar, a jerk, ect??? I think you need to face what is REAL and figure out if you want to try to work things out with your husband, or else leave him. But remember, what seems to be is not always what it really is. Please keep this in mind and don't assume that things would be wonderful with this fantasy man. They may not be. I hope you will think carefully and make a wise decision. Good luck!
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