A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Dear CupidPlease will you help me?I feel upset, ashamed and embarrassed. It seems as though no one wants to form any genuine friendships with me. I'm making the effort to get in touch with all the people I know because I'm fedup with feeling sad and lonely. I txt someone from my college because we have all finished now. I asked her how she is and then made conversation such as I've been really busy and not been feeling well recently but I got my college results back and passed. She txt me back and not much and sad glad your ok. There was no sence of real interest in me. Also, I've tried to make arrangements with 3 other people to meet up my local town and they have said no in there own words.Also, I txt my dad over two weeks ago asking how he was and making an effort to see how his is and everything in his life. I told him about passing my tests from college and I haven't heard anything back. I sent a second message and still not hear of himI just feel on some level that I'm not really that important in people's life's and like they really don't care about me. I lead a busy active life but were ever I go it is always the same result. Please help me if you will Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 July 2012): I know how that feels. I'm in the same situation, for some reason, people are not interested in me, I don't know why, I'm a nice person and I have a good sense of humor, I can make people laugh. I've noticed that in conversations with acquaintances, I'm always the one asking questions about their life, and if I don't do that, then there will be an awkward silence. But they never ask me anything.
I think that is very rude, because even if they are not really interested, it would be polite to ask a couple of questions. Also, people sometimes can't remember my name after knowing me for quite some time, and very few people remember my birthday. I wish I was one of those magnetic people, everybody wants to be around.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 July 2012): When my friends and relatives are down and out or going thru bad times, I have no problem seeing them or talking over the phone with them, we would talk or see each other daily, my phone would be ringing off the hook as long as they need something but once they get back on their feet I can't hear from them, I would have to keep calling them to get in contact with them. This went on for years because I had a problem saying no to someone in need. Now that I have cut off the giving for good I don't have any friends and I only talk with a few of my relatives. I really hate for things to be this way but I had to wise up.You may think you have a problem but their someone with a problem bigger than yours so to let you know you are not alone, I have not one friend and I'm starting to like it this way because I was being used. I have done so much for friends and relatives but when I need something done I would have to pay them and I've never charge them one dime for what I did for them, so now when I need something done I find someone in the yellow page (phonebook)so I'm pretty much happy this way because I don't have to use my gas taking them to the store or where they need to go.I'm telling you this so you can be very careful how you choose your friends. I know a lot of people but I don't get that close and attach to them, when I see them out it's a few words, hello, how are you and good bye. You are still young, there will come a time you will meet someone, you just have to get yourself out there.Lonely Me
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A
female
reader, BondGirl72  +, writes (15 July 2012):
 I am not going to tell you you lack confidence. Some people do, but you have actively tried to make friendships with others and they have declined. Don't be too hard on yourself. People are so busy in today's world, they don't have time to have genuine friendships. I can see this in some of the friends I have. Even when you do make what you think is a good friend, you will plan to do things with them and it will be a disaster or they will sit at dinner and text or IM people. Trust me, it is not YOU. More than likely it is THEM. I have two or three people I consider very good friends, but we all work together so we see one another mainly at work. Don't worry too much. When you are done with college and get a job, you will make friends with people. Good people, not people who will just blow you off. If it means anything to you, I don't have any friends from college anymore. We have all gone our separate ways and have our own lives now. What you are going through is not so unusual. Hang in there!
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A
female
reader, cute angel  +, writes (15 July 2012):
 Aww I'm sorry,I'm sure life must be hard not finding the right people to confide in..
I think you should contact those people who take you as friend rather than an option..
What are your hobbies?why don't you take up some classes that your interested in and may be you'l find some people with similar interests and who you can click:)
Good luck x
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (15 July 2012):
I wonder if your apparent lack of confidence/loneliness is making you so worried that you're picking anyone to be a friend, rather than people who are actually suitable or worth your time.
Or perhaps your father's lack of interest is having the same effect,
You are an important person, and I think that with a bit more scrutiny over those you want to be friends with, you'll see that you are cared for. So I would suggest that you really think about who you are, what your hobbies are etc, and try to form friendships with people who are more like you. And don't give up.
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A
female
reader, IamJess +, writes (15 July 2012):
 Maybe your just paranoid thinking people don't care about you, your friend replied and said she's glad your ok, if she didn't care I don't think she'd of bothered texting back, she might of been busy at the time, and everyone might be busy for a little bit because of things they got going on, you need to relax and stop thinking everyone doesn't care about you. Your yourself important, and need to find strength in yourself to get through this, try ringing your dad, or ringing your friends and you'll hear the real reaction over the phone in their voice whether their off with you or not.
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