A
female
age
30-35,
*assycassy
writes:So my last boyfriend and i broke up about 2 months ago and now him and i are really good friends. we get along and were still kindof flirty but its all fun. him me and my other girl friend are really close and we always hang out. the problem is that even though him and i broke up i still love him both as my friend and more than that. there is however another guy who likes me and i kindof like him but there is no way i could go out with him or any one else because i feel like it would absolutly ruin things with me and my two buds. i cant help feeling like im doing something wrong by liking this other guy a little bit, but i know im not. so i guess im just not sure what im supposed to do because i dont want to be mean to this new guy and i feel like im leading him on and i know i cant and wont go out with him. what should i do?
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broke up, flirt, my ex Reply to this Question
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female
reader, sassycassy +, writes (13 December 2009):
sassycassy is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you so much guys. all ur responses are greatly appreciated and help a lot. ur answers have really made me think about this whole situation from different perspectives.
just to clear some things up though...
i have told this new guy that for now i just want to be friends and see where that takes us and he said that was fine and he understands. i dont really feel like im ready to go out with anyone yet. also about my ex, i dont know if him and i will get together again. theres a chance that we will but it seems like for now we are just super good friends. for now i will just be friends with them both and see what happens.
A
male
reader, CellarDoor89 +, writes (13 December 2009):
 Honestly I know its cliche but I would just be honest with this new guy of yours. Tell him that you are interested in him but that you want to take it super slow right now because you just recently broke up with someone. If he's a good enough guy he should understand. As for your ex-boyfriend all that I can say is that you guys arnt together anymore and if he thinks theres still a chance that you guys could get together then you need to stop leading him on. That doesnt mean you cant hang out with him, just that it might not be smart to cuddle and crap. Good luck.
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A
female
reader, DiamondGirlx  +, writes (13 December 2009):
 If you really like him and you know you wont get back with your ex then give this new guy a chance, however it sounds like your not going to because you worrying about your ex's feelings however if you are ex's then it shouldnt matter and as a mate he will be happy for you, unless there is hope of reconciliation for the two of you??? x
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A
female
reader, LoneHeart +, writes (13 December 2009):
Well its a very gray area, in which you are standing. It sounds like you still have strong ties with that ex boyfriend because you guys are really good friends. You do have to make a decision though. You should decide if you are ready to be with other people, and if you are you have to take that first step and go out with that guy or another guy. Eventually that ex boyfriend of yours will have to see you with someone else, unless you get back with him. Unless you're going to just wait until he finds someone new. Then you wouldn't feel bad because he has taken the first step with someone els. Which brings in the idea, why not set him up with someone else. If that question makes you feel uncomfortable, then maybe you do still want more than just friendship with him.
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A
male
reader, CoolAndCoolest  +, writes (13 December 2009):
you are going thru an age where you may feel all these things. let things go on or think of having anyone at a time.
or if you are interested in multiple boys tell it to your bf otherwise it will be cheating.
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