A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:recently my so called mates don't ask me if im coming out, or want to stay and they are always together that doesn't bother me it just annoys me that they don't ask me anymore, and because im being excluded. also recently i asked one of them if they wanted to hang out, they said that they didn't know what time they where babysitting at, but before that she said that she wasn't doing anything.now they arn't replying to my texts, and im just being ignored,should i just leave them and find new mates, all that has change with me is that i got a man, which they are jealous about cause they keep making snarky comments, and telling everybody in school what we have been doing. i dont spend more time with him than i do with them but recently i have because im just being ignored.
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female
reader, shiraz +, writes (2 January 2009):
at the end of your post i got the impression your 'mates' were simply jealous of your new guy yet real mates are cool with you getting a guy as long as you balance it and never put him before them etc. however i dont think these people are really your mates, they dont really care about your feelings and will constantly exclude you, its no a good feeling and it will start to affect you. i think you should keep your options open, detach yourself from them, mingle with new people you wouldnt normally. dont completely cut them off just be as they have been to you- see how they like it plus once they see you enjoying yourself they may change there opinion!
dont let what they say wreck your new found happiess, its a new year and time for a change in more ways than one. you take control, balance it well, enjoy your new guy and enter a new social circle. ENJOY IT! best of luck xxx
A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 January 2009): it sounds like a bit of jealousy at first but i cannot help thinking that if they were real friends they would be more supportive and understanding. friends should always be there for you to hang out or listen to you not to talk behind your back and spread rumors about you. i'm not saying to tell them off but the best two aspects of any relationship no matter how in depth are friendship and communication. (the latter applying to this situation) youshold be able to talk things out with them and if not then they weren't very good friends and go out and find yourself some new mates that are just as compassionate as you.
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A
female
reader, SoftlyCaress  +, writes (2 January 2009):
 Well you spend time with your man give them time if they are true friends they will come around and start missing you . Just dont get yourself down keep your head up and let them see you are living no matter what .Sometimes people are jealous and childish and think that they cant have more then one friend at a time . Which is a very sad thing but no matter what let them know you are there for them when they need you . But keep living enjoy your life and your time with your boyfriend...
GOOD LUCK !!
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